While clubbing on Saturday
British Asian bloke (after dancing with me for some time): You're a really fantastic dancer! If I were to ask for your number, would you give it to me?
Me: Yes, but only as a friend for now.
BAb: Okay. [walks off]
At work, with a friend who doesn't usually go out drinking
Friend: I wasn't aware that my friend's alcohol tolerance was so low. She wanted to vomit after only having half a pint of Erdinger and she passed out in the cab.
Me: So she threw up when you guys got home?
Friend: No! She wanted to throw up outside Jazz@SouthBridge. I thought, "Oh my God!" This is Jazz@SouthBridge. People don't throw up outside here. This is not