Friday, December 09, 2005

My good friends took me out for a wonderful dinner at Menotti's tonight. I haven't seen them in ages, and I ended up talking non-stop for close to 2.5 hours. I'm always worried that I'll end up talking incessantly, to the point that they wish that I'd just shut up... but tonight, I guess it was a good thing because we had so much to catch up on. And although we've all changed, we've always stayed more or less the same. I've grown a little older, a little louder, and perhaps, a little cruder (in terms of the language I use, so inured I am after having studied in London and worked alongside my colleagues for so long), while another friend has remained as provocative and outspoken as ever, the self-declared "Samantha" of our Sex and the City quartet. Another one of us definitely falls into the "Carrie" role, so much does she love shopping, especially for branded items. The remaining two, unfortunately, aren't so clearly delineated. I, for instance, am a combination between seemingly tough, career-driven "Miranda" and good girl "Charlotte", while my friend isn't quite "Miranda", and she definitely isn't "Charlotte". So we don't really know how to categorise us two.

And as I was chatting with them, I found myself reflecting on how 2005 has gone so far. I decided at the beginning of the year that I wouldn't just spend time on work, that rather I'll spend more time with friends, and doing the things I enjoy, and achieve something meaningful. I'd say that I've been mostly successful. I've made quite a few new friends this year, some of whom have become close, dear friends, in spite of the troubles that we've gone through. I've also returned to dancing although it's the kind of dancing I wouldn't show anyone else... this was also the cause of my back injury which still hurts from time to time. I did my best (hah!) to sit for the CFA Level I exam. At work, I did all of my duties to the best of my abilities, culminating in my receiving an exemplary performance appraisal earlier this week. Whether my company chooses to reward me adequately for what I've done remains to be seen. I am most definitely not a stranger to being bitterly disappointed by my company, and I do hope with all my heart that this situation will change in the near future.

I have a week more in Singapore before leaving for my three week vacation in London and Rome which I'm rather nervous about, as I'll also be looking at some opportunities. I'm fervently hoping that I can fulfill my potential and achieve that which I've always wanted during this trip. At the same time, I'll be spending three weeks with my family. I usually spend less than a day with them during a normal week, so this will be both a welcome change (at times) and a great ordeal, as we're all so stubborn and impatient that we tend to get on one another's nerves.

All in all, this has been an incredibly busy year for me - socially and work-wise. While it has been very taxing on my system, I hope that this doesn't change over the next few years, no matter where I am. I feel happier today - this month! - than I've been in a while and I almost feel as if I can do anything I set my mind to. I acknowledge that certain events that took place a few months ago did almost drive me into what would have been considered clinical depression but I'm gradually coming out of the shell that I withdrew into in the aftermath and also because of exam preparations.

In short, I'm feeling happier, friendlier, more driven, a little older and definitely a little wiser than I did at the beginning of the year... and that's definitely a good thing.

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