Within half an hour of arriving home after having watched The White Masai, the following things happened.

My father told me that I need to take better care of my knees, and stop going out so late at night. Otherwise, I'll end up like Robbie Fowler and never be able to play football at my peak again.*

On MSN:
Friend 1: Why don't you carry her next time?
Friend 2: Only if she gets so drunk she p***es herself.
Me: Would you actually want to carry me then? Even I wouldn't want to carry me.

I rounded it off by explaining how Pokemon works to T.

*If you don't get why that's funny, it's because I don't play football in the first place. And yes, my knees are getting better, but I still have difficulty walking down stairs.