Mark Gilbert writes, "if banks were musicians, Citigroup would be Ozzy." He then goes on to liken nine other large banks to musicians, comparing Merrill Lynch to Madonna (oh, come on!) and HSBC to "any boyband." Ha ha! Burn!

8) HSBC = any boyband

Guns N' Roses has been poised to release "Chinese Democracy'' for a decade. While some tracks have been performed live or been leaked in rough form, the album itself still isn't available. HSBC Holdings Plc has been poised to use its platform in Asian investment banking as the springboard to become a fully fledged global investment bank for at least as long.

HSBC, though, could be any manufactured boyband. The true performers earn peanuts, while the management reaps the financial rewards. And, if there is a genius Robbie Williams lurking in the line-up, there's too much dead wood for the talent to shine through.