Wednesday, July 02, 2003

Sometimes, I just like to surprise people by doing something different, something unexpected. I strike people as being rather conservative - or at least, I used to - and so, sometimes, it's easy to surprise others.

Other times, I play it very safe - or safe in my own way. I walked home alone from clubbing the other night at 3.55am and was scolded by my parents for that. For good reason, I suppose; my country's the second-safest country in the world and yet, just the other day, someone managed to assault a woman sexually in one of the national parks. Despite the fact that I've been through far worse cities - London, Rome, Florence, Paris - and by myself at that, I wasn't that disturbed when I was in those cities. Why I'm kind of affected by this incident is because my city is supposed to be very safe, so safe that you don't need to worry, to take precautions. And it was comforting to not be distracted by worrying about one's safety. Now, the mood has changed.

At the same time, I do wonder that if by playing safe all the time, and not going out by myself at night, whether I'd be missing out on things. An artist once invited me out for a drink at the local bar in Mallorca, but I declined as I was afraid of being with him in a strange place where I didn't speak the language. In Florence, I declined another artist's invitation to his studio where he wanted to sketch me. Yes, I do regret turning down both invitations and I do wonder how much I've missed out on by my decision to err on the side of caution both times. Better be safe than sorry, so the saying goes. But that does makes life rather dull and boring, doesn't it?

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