Speaking to a girlfriend of mine who has been in roughly the same situation as I've been over the last few years - coupled with the same New Year's resolution that she makes every year and fails to keep - we commiserated over the one main difference between males and females that we've never been able to comprehend.

"I guess, even when it's over and you both should move on, you don't quite expect them to move on so quickly," she said. "Yes," I sighed, "and to them, four months is a long time, but to us, it's... like a blink of an eye, because we gave so much of ourselves that it takes ages to get over them." To make things worse, I have a male friend who once declared it took him the sum total of a day to get over being dumped by his girlfriend of two years. And as far as I could tell, it wasn't a boast borne out of bravado, but rather, a genuine response. He just shrugged and moved on.

I lamented to an ex a few weeks back that I hated how difficult it was for me to get over people and that it was impossible for me to do flings because I just get too involved, too committed. He said he thought that wasn't quite the bad thing I made it out to be, that it was one of my endearing traits.

But I, for one, am sick of it, sick of wondering what it is that I could have done differently, of being so certain that it must be something that I've done or something that I am, because, having grown up on stupid, annoying fairy tales, romantic movies and love songs which make you believe that "love will find a way" and that "all you need is love", that as long as you're dedicated enough, surely you two will triumph?

Apparently, another trait of mine that ex liked is my ability to remain friends with ex-es after the relationship ends. "It's not as easy as it looks," I said. "It wasn't all that easy with you either, regardless of how much of our relationship you seem to have forgotten." But I do sometimes wish I had the ability to just walk away and not bother any more, even if the other party didn't do anything intrinsically wrong. Sometimes, often times, it's just easier to move on when the other person's not a presence in your life.