I think I'm ready for the CFA exam now in the "Fuck it, I don't give a damn" any more kind of way.

That's probably not good.

The thing is - I'm in the middle of making my notes now, and while it's taking me far far longer than I took last year (I spent the whole of the weekend doing Book 3 and I am still not done, although admittedly, I am a lot less focussed than I used to be) - I kind of feel as if I understand everything in the most superficial way and that everyone else is freaking out and they have had far more time than I've had, so, if I were to infer from all of this, it's this one inalienable fact: I'm screwed.

And yes, to put things into perspective, the worst that can happen is that I fail this paper, and I can always retake it next year. Still, after everything, after struggling to balance work and studying for so long, after sacrificing the last few weekends and almost going crazy because I don't have that many friends here (something which doesn't make it easier to study, but does exacerbate my frustration at being a little cooped up and lonely), I really want those f***ing initials, and I want them this year.