This weekend is Winter Wanders weekend staged by Walk London, an organisation dedicated to promoting walking as a way of life. There will be around 40 free guided walks throughout London covering central and outer London [via the International Herald Tribune Globespotters blog].

I have narrowed my list of walks down to 6.5 mile walk covering Tower Hill to Greenwich (a special walk entitled "Exploring Seafaring London") or the 5 mile walk covering Tower Hill to Island Garden (guided by the Chairman of the River Thames Society).

Coming on the back of my returning to my dance class (at a more advanced level too) and 2 hours 15 minutes of aerobics at the Time Out and YMCA Legwarmers and Lycra event yesterday ("a celebration of 40 years of aerobics exercise") involving one particular insane-in-an-awesome-feel-the-burn kind of way class called T-BOW and a brief boxercise workout which reminded me why I liked it so much when I went for it pre-university days, this is shaping up to be a rather healthy week for me... not including the slices of Chocolate Raspberry Hazelnut cake and Boston Brownie from Konditor & Cook earlier this week of course.

What harm can it do to find out? It's a question that left bruises down the centuries, even more than "It can't hurt if I only take one" and "It's all right if you only do it standing up."
- Making Money by Terry Pratchett

Can you tell I'm rediscovering the joys of being a library member? I read Neil Gaiman's Death: The High Cost of Living and absolutely loved the art and just the whole way Death was portrayed. I'm tempted to reread the entire The Sandman series because a number of them are available for borrowing but I'm trying so hard to read more practical books with titles such as Speak with Confidence, The Networking Survival Guide and so on and so forth. I just find books about reality so boring unless it's Freakonomics or Den of Thieves or something like that.

There is absolutely nothing in the world you can name that cannot be found in London. Take the simple Asian pleasure that is karaoke for instance. Here, we have:

• Hip Hop Karaoke - HHK is a monthly affair which allows you to tap into your inner gangsta' and display it for all and sundry to see. The event is free and takes place on the third Thursday of the month at The Social with doors opening at 6 pm. While I'd certainly love to check it out one of these days, I know for sure I would never be able to do this. For one thing, I didn't recognise any song on their playlist other than 50 Cent - In Da Club and I would never do that sober and/or voluntarily!
• Soulbrew Karaoke - If you've ever wanted to go on stage and belt out songs from the good ol' days of Motown with the backing of a 5-piece band, then this is the night for you. The next one takes place this Friday, January 30th, at Vibe Bar on Brick Lane from 8 pm to 1 am (entry: £4). Check out videos from previous Soulbrew Karaoke sessions here.
• Karauke - Pronounced "carry-you-kee", this is the best of the lot, in my humble opinion. Any genre of music sung with the backing of a ukulele orchestra. I'll never be able to listen to Human League - Don't You Want Me Baby in quite the same way ever again. This takes place on the third Thursday of the month at the The Royal George (1-3 Goslett Yard, off Charing Cross Road, WC2) from 7 pm (entry: £5).
• Eat and Drink - And of course, for plain ol' simple karaoke, there's always Eat and Drink Chinese restaurant, aka the secret Chinese karaoke restaurant on Artillery Passage (off Bishopsgate). It's essentially a karaoke free-for-all, with karaoke commencing at 9 pm. Opening times are variable so it's advisable to call in advance (tel: 0871 971 6632). Prices for meals are about £25 per head, so one website advises.

I am starting to get a little annoyed with people coming up to me and telling me that, rather than looking for a job now, I should take the next three to six months off and just go travelling or take up a hobby or go to the theatre more often or something. It's almost as if they don't quite realise that one needs money to do all of these activities.

While I'm not exactly living on the poverty line, I am acutely aware that if the economic situation doesn't turn out as people hope it'll turn out this year (i.e. some signs of a recovery by late 2009), if I had done any of those things, I would probably fervently wish I hadn't, especially if I end up having to go for a high-cost MBA option.

On another note, I succumbed to two prevailing trends. I bought a mock croc patent belt and a leopard-print belt from Primark for a total cost of less than £5. Yes, ethical dubiousness be damned, I'm a total Primark convert.

Edited on February 3, 2009: After another Primark shopping blitz, I am now the proud owner of two slim belts (in patent black and patent blue), in addition to two gorgeous retro-inspired bras, and two retro necklaces. All this because I decided not to get warm thermal socks (such a mistake after all the snow) and forgot to get an eyeliner pencil sharpener last week.

After meeting with someone regarding a potential opportunity in a field where I would really like to work, I went off in a stressed-out state and called home to wish my parents a Happy New Year.

My father, typical man that he is, ended the call with a "All right, don't be so uptight. Go home now and relax. I have to use the toilet now. Love you."

Seriously, only a man could end a call off with that.

But after we hung up, I was just so overcome - with homesickness, heartbreak and stress - that I just wanted to find a quiet alley somewhere on the street to cry and let it all out. Instead, I sucked it up and went off to run my errands.

I'm down, but not out.

Or so, I keep telling myself.

Gong xi fa cai everyone!

After the events of the Year of the Rat, the only way the Year of the Ox is going to go for me is up.

As you may have guessed, I am returning to my domestic goddess roots as a result of my current situation. And because I haven't been utilising this particular skill of mine ever since my university days, I've been relying mainly on my trusty wok to rustle up dinner over the past week or so. Tonight, I cooked mini turkey cutlets seasoned with curry powder and lemon juice stir-fried with lettuce, capisicum and cherry tomatoes, with a final dash of soy sauce at the end.

It didn't turn out as expected; the moment I added in the vegetables, the stir-fry became unexpectedly moist (one reason why I will not be purchasing Tesco bean-sprouts and mushroom stirfry packet again, as I do not like overly moist dishes). However, I'm pleased to report the end-result was unexpectedly delicious. The tomatoes were very tangy (far more so than when eaten raw) and the flavour of the capisicum was nicely enhanced. The overall gravy was piquant and slightly spicy.

Yum!

Right.

I've swept the floor (twice), changed the sheets (to the ones featuring Chinese characters), and got a haircut. I have purchased a cake from one of my favourite bakeries, Konditor & Cook (at full price, because silly me forgot the voucher, and thought they would be nice enough to accept that I had it in PDF format on my Blackberry) for the reunion lunch tomorrow. As an aside, K&C are also the bakery I made my way to after hearing the news that my position would be cut because the first thing I thought was "I need cake." Honest to goodness. And because the shop nearest me have a "purchase four cakes for £6" deal after 3 pm (a saving of around £4), poor devastated me thought that there was a brilliant deal and ended up eating cake for the next week.

I've even bought myself a new dress from a Singaporean designer who has just moved to London for work. I may or may not wear it tomorrow, but it is my item of new clothing for the Year of the Ox. There may be more on the way, but I'm taking my time to think about the rest of the pieces I liked.

Yes sirree, I may be unemployed soon, but, as MD put it, I should take a bit of a break and just pamper myself just a little. That, and I did indeed get a bonus for the work I did last year. It's not a huge sum of money (it's over 75% down on what I received on the year before) but it is still something, and it should help tide me over for a couple of months.

I'm also a tad depressed, and the cold, wet weather has been getting to me, even though today's unexpected sunshine (which I hope translated into the photos I took) did cheer me up just a little right before a dehydration-induced headache struck.

So the biggest merger in the financial services sector in 2008 seems to be unravelling faster than a pair of too-cheap trousers on a too-fat man just weeks into 2009, much like other mega-bank mergers which preceded it. After Merrill's $15.3 billion in losses in the fourth quarter of 2008 alone, and news about the accelerated secret last-minute bonus payments to Merrill's staff (a bonus pool of $15 billion, up 6% year-on-year and to be shared out amongst fewer staff after the job cuts of the past 12 months), former financial services pin-up boy John Thain has been given the boot.

And rightly so, in my opinion!

In related news, more evidence that the senior guys at Merrill really don't give a crap about the economy and what almost happened to their company. In addition to John Thain spending $1.2 million on redecorating his office last year, he, as reported in today's Guardian, apparently "booked a trip to Davos, Switzerland after [B of A CEO Ken] Lewis said he should not go. He also left for a family holiday in Vail, the exclusive Colorado ski resort, after the Merrill losses came to light."

Sometimes I've got to wonder just how many knocks life is going to throw at me before it accepts that I simply will not go down without a fight... even if, for the past few days, all I've wanted to do is to go back to bed and just go a month without crying. Just one.

I'm trying to be understanding and patient, but, at the same time, I'm furious and hurt and just wondering whether there's anything there worth fighting for. There's a difference between not giving up and knowing when you should walk away. And I can't fight if no one's got my back. Not in this case.

That being said, I'm just getting through each day with unexpected pleasures, such as going to my local library and picking up the John Morton's Investing with the Grand Masters (which bizarrely includes HRH Prince of Wales as one such grand master) for only 50p, as well as finding these insanely aggressively cute Mr. T mugs by Tee and Toast available at Hidden Art [via Retro to Go].

Here's a link to the long-overdue debut Essential Mix by Greg Wilson, one of the pioneers of the UK clubbing scene, and someone I have had the privilege of going to see when I was in New York last year.

If you got into clubbing any time over the last decade, this may not be music you're used to. It's chockful of funky disco goodness, and, even if you - like myself at one point in time - detest this kind of music, it's worthwhile remembering that, without these guys, the clubbing and dance music scene as we know it would be totally different.

This is awesome: a spine-tinglingy, unbelievable Black Cab Session featuring Brian Wilson. And if that wasn't good enough, after performing That Lucky Old Sun, the band then spontaneously breaks out into California Girls, with Brian Wilson's voice showing (almost) no sign of the toll the last few years must have taken on him. 

Buffet Libre's Rewind 2 project features a number of remakes from the '80s and '90s done by the hip young bands of today, including hotly tipped Little Boots doing a fantastic electro-driven cover of Freddie Mercury - Love Kills and Man Like Me covering Salt 'n' Pepa - Let's Talk About Sex. They're not all gems, but it's good fun nonetheless.

[Via Pop Candy]

A number of friends have told me they're amazed at how brave and positive I am about what's happened.

The truth is, I'm not. I'm just like everyone else out there. I'm experiencing my fair share of anger and grumpiness, and the occasional teary-eyed moment (usually only when MD is around). However, I also recognise that I've got to suck it up and get on with my life because I cannot afford to slow down. My CV's been pulled together and I'm sending out job applications and getting out there and meeting people, all in the name of raising my profile so that I can seize the relevant opportunities when the job market picks up later this year.

That's 'when', not 'if'.

The other reason why I'm appearing so positive? Well, no one wants to deal with a whinger. And I've always been a strong believer in the adage that God helps those who help themselves. In other words, I've got to do everything I can. I've fought almost my entire career just to get here. I'm not going to let this send me packing. 

It's also good to have friends sending me their best wishes and telling me that they're sure I'll be able to find something here because of my skills and talents. I personally think they're seeing more in me than I've ever seen in myself, but hey, if they see it, maybe potential employers will see it too!

And face it, I can't afford not to be positive either. If I thought even for one second that it wasn't worth my being here, that it'll just be a serious drain on resources that could be better spent elsewhere, I might as well pack up and head back to Singapore right away. After all, I know far more people back home, as do my former managers, and I ought to be able to pick up a job far more quickly than here, even if it is in a field I'm trying to leave.

Could I be wrong? Of course I could be. But I'm confident that I'll look back on this and count this as one of the greatest accomplishments of my life. Not just getting a job, but just not giving up.