You are Neo, from "The Matrix." You
display a perfect fusion of heroism and
compassion.

What Matrix Persona Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Most of my friends are graduate students overseas. Reading their blogs about how much they're going to miss student life and the cities which they're currently in (London, Cambridge, New York...) strikes a chord with me. I still miss London life, and mourn the things I never got to do - like watching a show at the Globe, or not visiting any of London's famous gardens. Going to watch the Phantom of the Opera or go roller-blading in Hyde Park once more. Going to one of the famous summer festivals - like Glastonbury or Creamfields.

But then again, I guess I really should count my blessings that I managed to spend three years there in the first place. But that's the thing with me - I'm rarely content. I believe being content is a sign of mediocrity. I tend to always hunger for better things. I've certainly never accepted my limitations or flaws - or even my strengths. But I digress. I did get the opportunity to do a lot of things - like travel around Europe, or see shows such as The Lion King, Humble Boy and Rent. Or wander around South Kensington, visiting the numerous museums along the way and discovering for myself, unexpectedly, the magificent walls that make up the Royal Albert Hall. Getting to spend nine months living beside one of the most gorgeous sights in London - Tower Bridge.

I do miss it all though. Very much so. I miss the blessed uncomplicated nature of life then as compared to the ugly political corporate world I inhabit now.

One of the little things that make me miss the British isles: How does Dyson make water go uphill?

Yes, Dyson. He of the bagless vacuum cleaner fame. I first became aware of him during a 2nd year tutorial, when my teacher - the best teacher I had in the whole of my university life, I must add - brought him up, apropos of nothing, and connected Dyson's then on-going court battles with what we had been learning in lectures. I wonder how my teacher is doing now. He really was brilliant.

Apparently, the way a man dances is a dead giveaway to his performance between the sheets. I suppose this explains why I'm always looking at how a man moves whenever I'm on the dancefloor - I'm looking for anyone with passion! I've got to agree with the results though; over-the-top dancing is a definite no-no.

Cuddling may be good medicine for the heart. That's nice to hear. Now there's scientific evidence to back up one of my favourite activities! Now if I could only get someone to hug...

A friend of mine is going to the Loveparade in Vienna later this year (not to be confused with the one in Berlin). I had actually thought that the Loveparade and the Rainbow Parade (Regenbogen Parade in German) was the same thing since they both take place in the same city at around the same time.

In any case, it got me thinking about my little trip to Central Europe last summer. I especially recall the Rainbow Parade since I didn't know that it was taking place during the period I would be in Vienna, and I so did not know it was going to be a gay pride parade. I had found out about it when I went to the Youth Tourism office one day and asked if there was anything interesting going on. Why, yes, I was told. The Regenbogen Parade, which was one of the highlights of Vienna. I'm the kind of person who's game for anything and I do mean, anything... Okay, maybe not, given the context of this particular parade, but I decided, well, let's go see it, if it's bad, I'll just go somewhere else on my tube pass, yeah?

So, on the day of the event, I headed off to the starting point of the parade (somewhere on the Ringstrasse), and stood watching for close to an hour all of these floats with gays and lesbians just wafting past me to the tunes of incredibly loud Euro techno. They were dressed outrageously and as I was the only Oriental there, I sure stood out - they noticed me all right. It was really entertaining. My favourite part was being given a vanilla-flavoured condom (not that I've tried it - it says so on the wrapper) by a really gorgeous blond guy dressed up as Eros. I looked down at the package he gave me, and much to my amusement, a picture of the self-same cupid was decorating the condom pack. Hee.

One would think that museums would not be among the most hip and happening places in any city, but to my amazement, the Rainbow Parade actually concluded with a free concert held at the MuseumsQuartier, home to some of the more well-known museums in the world, such as the Leopold Museum, which I happened to wander into one evening. Not a bad experience. In any case, since I stood out so obviously being the tourist that I was, I decided against going to the concert in the end. I was a little embarrassed in case people got the wrong idea!

I miss being able to travel to different and exotic locations. Somehow, riding in a coach for six hours only to end up in a city that is almost exactly like the one you recently departed has taken all the adventure out of travelling.

I just feel so guilty and filthy now. I had a big presentation today. The thing is - I've got a colleague who's giving a presentation tomorrow. We're both supposed to be in competition within the training programme which we're both in. I had gotten a lot of useful tips from my seniors, and I didn't want to tell him about the good things to do; it's not my fault if the overall boss of the department offered to go through my presentation, and not his. It's not my fault if he didn't want to go up to him and ask him to vet his own presentation either. This is the corporate world. I'm not obliged to have to tell him how to do an almost-perfect presentation. I also didn't want him to see my presentation slides - they had my points on them after all, but nevertheless, I did let him see them. I just feel so bad being so vague and not telling him all the good tips which I had received. Do I want my colleague to fail? No, but when you're being graded on a bell curve, if I help him out, it'll only be at my expense. So my behaviour is rational - homo economicus - survival of the fittest. So why do I still feel so guilty?

On another note, I'm currently in the department which I would like to end up working in after the end of my programme. I've been encouraged to run a 'low-key' campaign, talking to all the senior stuff in the department to let them know that I'm interested. There may or may not be an opening when I finish training, but if there is one, I definitely want to be considered. So, on that note, I spoke to one of the other senior staff today - and I felt kind of like a prostitute. I mean, I was trying to sell myself, professionally speaking, but man, it's not an easy thing for me to do, to walk up to these people and say, hey, I know you haven't worked with me at all, but I'd love to be your colleague in a couple of months time. I mean, I'm just opening myself up to being attacked - or getting a lot more work in an attempt for them to see what I'm made of. But at the same time, if they don't know that I'm interested, they're never going to think about me should there be an opening. Argh. I hate whoring myself.

And incidentally, the presentation was above average. Not the best job I could have done, but I was nervous.

Went clubbing last night. It was an... unexpectedly fun night. I went with the same friends who I went clubbing with on Wednesday - and they're non-trancers, so I didn't really expect them to have a fun time, but they did. The music was not bad at all and I had an incredible time dancing my heart out, especially when my friend challenged me to a London vs. Singapore showdown - I was representing London, of course. Did I lose? No. I rarely lose - but then there usually isn't ever a loser for such challenges! Some guy even loaned me his lightsticks much to my chagrin! I'm fine dancing but having to dance with lightsticks when everyone can see you, and despite the fact that I have very nice hand movements which are like, made for lightstick dancing, it was just kind of embarrassing! I obliged by dancing with the lightsticks for one song and then returned them. Hey, I'm a shy girl, okay?

There were a couple of bad things though. Drinks were a little weak - the White Russian tasted very dilute and not at all nice. The ventilation was horrible. It was so hot that had they decided to take my temperature after I had taken a drink and been in the room for five minutes, I probably would have failed straight away and asked to go see a doctor. It was immensely difficult dancing when it was so darn hot. I stopped every three or four songs just to wipe the sweat from my face. Even the glasses for the drinks weren't cold, so I couldn't even get that small comfort!

On a trance-related note, I just learnt that the vocals in Paul van Dyk's recent single, Nothing but You, actually do say something. Apparently, the lyrics are "Jeg har ingenting men jeg har alt nar jeg har deg" which is Norwegian for "I have nothing but I have everything when I have you." Call me cheesy, call me a emotional sucker, call me a sap, but I find that phrase just so sweet.

Further proof of my non-linearity in reasoning:

David is the son of Jane. Jane is the ________ of David's mother. (Fill in the blank.)

My answer: Logical equivalent (with an argument to back it up if need be)

The 'proper' answer: Name

I never did think very straight when it came to simple things. And it was just over five minutes later after I gave my friend who came up with this brainteaser (if it can be called as such) my answer that I realised that there was a logical fallacy in my own argument - that Jane had to be a female name, when there's no absolute law that decrees it as such.

Good to know that my university education hasn't gone entirely to waste.

From the Friday Five:

1. What drinking water do you prefer -- tap, bottle, purifier, etc.?
Volvic still mineral water. Acquired a taste for it in London, but as tap water's fine to drink here, I haven't had Volvic in a while.

2. What are your favourite flavor of chips?
Sour Cream 'n' Onion. Or Nacho Cheese.

3. Of all the things you can cook, what dish do you like the most?
I'm the kind of person who considers everything possible so I wouldn't say that there are dishes that I can't cook. But of the dishes that I have cooked so far, I have to say that I like my Carbonara the best.

4. How do you have your eggs?
Half-boiled with a lot of dark sauce.

5. Who was the last person who cooked you a meal? How did it turn out?
My mother, who cooks me a meal every evening for dinner. They always turn out great, especially the Italian dishes. Bless you, Mum. If you mean a non-family member, then the last person to have cooked me a dish would be the ex. Nowadays, with food so cheap over here, my friends and I would rather eat out than cook. It's the cleaning up that really gets us.

Hmm. Just checked out the rest of the Friday Five archives. Turns out I missed this gem two weeks ago. I'll have a go at it despite my lateness.

Have decided to edit this so that I'll have different answers than the list I posted a few months back just for some variety.

1. Name one song you hate to admit you like.
Erm. There are plenty, quite frankly, but I'd have to go with either My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion or The Thong Song by Sisqo.

2. Name two songs that always make you cry.
Full of Grace - Sarah McLachlan
Crash and Burn - Savage Garden

3. Name three songs that turn you on.
All I Want Is You - U2
Here With You - Dido
Where's Your Head At - Basement Jaxx

4. Name four songs that always make you feel good.
That Thing You Do! - That Thing You Do!
Let Me Clear My Throat - DJ Kool
Just Can't Wait to be King - The Lion King
There She Goes - The Las

5. Name five songs you couldn't ever do without.
Yellow - Coldplay
Regret - New Order
Sabotage - Beastie Boys
Satisfaction Skank - Fatboy Slim
Thank You - Dido

This sounds like fun.

Wish I were still in London. William Shakespeare and Rap. Can't go wrong.

Woke up at 12.20 pm today. A friend asked me how we could manage staying out and clubbing till 3 am. I told her it was easy but I'd forgotten the other side of it - it's the waking up and surviving the next day that's difficult. Slightly regretting my decision to go out yesterday night now, as I've got an invitation to a night of trance this Saturday. Mostly local DJs, but with a special guest - Miika Kuisma (Fluid In Motion/AR52) from Finland. I'm kind of excited - I do like Scandinavia and all things Scandic. ;)

With regards to last night... it was retro dress up club night. I had originally wanted to dress up but ended up going in my pink spaghetti strap top and favourite pair of jeans. It was my first time wearing a strappy top without anything over it in a while, as I'm embarrassed about my acne-scarred back, which I've spent close to two months' salary on trying to clear up. Anyway, for the outfit I was planning on wearing, I was thinking about going as '60s hippie - or close to it. I had on a translucent blue lace top and a knee-length hippie/gypsy skirt, and was wearing an antique metal necklace. I had a blue metal flower pin in my hair and was going to attach a rose onto my skirt as well. It probably was more flamenco than hippie, but hey, it's a change from what I usually wear, being among the minority of females who doesn't usually wear anything sleeveless to go partying in (due to aforementioned back problem).

But then... I got online and was speaking to a friend who told me under no circumstances should I wear anything that glows under UV light - which the top, unfortunately, does do, so I changed. I was wondering if I could dance in a skirt anyway, as I really wanted to strut my stuff because there was a Best Dancer competition going on and, assuming I had the courage (alcohol-induced or no), I would have gone for it.

However, seeing as today is a public holiday, a lot of people went down to that same party - there were 5000 people in the club at its peak, and the dance floor was so crowded that you couldn't really move. We had to wait 45 minutes for our drinks at the bar - there were that many people. So we retired to another room in the club which was playing decent hip hop, but unfortunately played all my favourite songs while we were waiting for our drinks so I couldn't dance to them. I've been wanting to hear Try Again by Aaliyah and Let Me Blow Your Mind by Eve in a club for a while but I didn't get a chance to dance to them!

20 minutes after we got our drinks, the DJ somehow went back to choosing weird music and we went outside to get some fresh air... and more drinks! A G&T, B-52 and a Long Island Iced Tea later, we headed back to the main room to see what music they were playing. Wednesday's retro night is renowned as the best retro night in the country, and I was disgusted to hear them playing techno of all kinds of music!! I mean, come on, I really wanted to go cheese clubbing. I have clubbing moods, and I've been wanting cheese for a very long time.

Fellow trancers, I apologise for that admission, but hey, trance dancing and cheese dancing are very different... and I just happen to love them both. So sue me.

Oooooh. Pleasantly drunk after a night of hip hop and old friends. Nice break tomorrow (or today, should I say?).

Missing you. Wish you were here. Hip hop's always damn sexy to dance to, especially with a partner. Felt kind of sexy myself and wanted to pull, but knew that I'd really only wanted someone exactly like you.

Sweet dreams.

I was speaking to a friend earlier today, and for some reason, he's already managed to get his hands on a copy of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Not the book, mind you, but in Word document form. He sent it to me, as I'm a HP addict myself, but I'm still not sure as to the authenticity of the document. The official release date of the book is June 21st after all, and even The Sun returned the copies that someone found in some field near the publishers so as not to let the cat out of the bag.

Me? I'm afraid I'm not so honest. I forwarded it a friend of mine in the US for his entertainment.

After knock-off time, my colleagues and I let off some steam by entertaining ourselves with this baby - Which X-Man Are You?

Truth be told, it's not restricted to just the X-Men, but tells you which Marvel superhero (or superheroine) you are. Having grown up on Marvel comics, I was laughing myself silly with that quiz.

It turned out that I'm Psylocke. Not only an X-Man, but a beautiful one too. Able to read other peoples' minds, discharge mental bolts, possesses a psionic knife which can either stun or kill people... and she's a highly skilled martial artist too! What more could one ask for?

What were my colleagues? Iron Man, Wolverine, Cyclops, Nightcrawler and Jean Grey. I'm happy with my powers; the rest, not so.

Erk. Went to gym today. Ache all over. Owwwwww.

I watched Talk to Her by Pedro Almodóvar (Spanish title: Hable con Ella). It was a pretty good film, if a little strange. But then, this having been my third Almodóvar film, I think it's safe to assume that most of his films tend to be a little convoluted and strange anyway. And seeing that it is a foreign film, I'm beginning to think that what makes a foreign film isn't the fact that it's in Spanish/French/German/Mandarin, etc. but just the fact that it's eccentric, and even intellectual.

The show focusses on the stories of two men - Benigno and Marco - who are in love with two comatose women, Alicia and Lydia respectively. The essential difference between Benigno and Marco, I feel, is that the former is living in a fantasy world, a world of his own making, refusing to see reality, whereas the latter has lived. Marco has travelled, he has had previous serious relationships, heck, he's even been with the woman he loves for the past couple of months. Benigno, on the other hand, has only watched Alicia from afar, before pretty much following her home. Despite B's somewhat harmless stalkeresque behaviour, his character unnerved me. I don't like quietly harmless psychotic characters - they kind of remind me of me! (Kidding, not really, it's just that quiet psychopaths creep me out, that's all.) The relationship between the two men is nice and the two interact well. I like that even though Benigno commits a rather heinous act - raping Alicia when he loses control of his passion after watching an amusing yet disturbing silent movie entitled The Shrinking Lover about the 'adventures' of a man who shrinks to a size so small that after being reunited with his lover, he enters her forever - Marco still remains his friend, even to the extent of rushing back from Jordan when he realises his friend has been imprisoned and getting him a new lawyer.

I guess, in the end, the show was really about two lonely people - Marco, because he was still grieving over his break-up with his lover ten years before, and Benigno, because he has never really experienced life, having had to take care of his mother for the past fifteen years even since he was little. It's probably not one of the better Almodóvar shows, but it's not bad either. I've heard that Live Flesh (Carne Trémula) is supposed to be the Almodóvar show to see, but as I haven't seen it, I can't comment. I've only watched All About My Mother (Todo Sobre Mi Madre) and The Flower of Her Secret (La Flor De Mi Secreto).

It probably wasn't a great day for me to watch the show because today has been a rather lonely day for me too, and lonely days, I don't really want to be with people. I'd really rather be around really good friends, and a lot of them aren't in the same country as I am right now. But fortunately, after having some drinks (non-alcoholic) with my friends and laughing about silly things, my mood changed and I'm happier now.

Oh, and by the way, I found the answer to a question asked in an earlier post:

Definition of a Hipster
Hipster - One who possesses tastes, social attitudes, and opinions deemed cool by the cool. (Note: it is no longer recommended that one use the term "cool"; a Hipster would instead say "deck.") The Hipster walks among the masses in daily life but is not a part of them and shuns or reduces to kitsch anything held dear by the mainstream. A Hipster ideally possesses no more than 2% body fat.
- Taken from The Hipster Handbook

Who would have thought such a website existed?

If you, like I, lament the demise of truly funny comic strips, then Martijn's Calvin and Hobbes site is definitely for you. I don't really find all that many comic strips as hilarious as I found Calvin and Hobbes, but then, my personality type is supposed to be that of Calvin's, so maybe that's why I bonded so well with him. Plus, in terms of drawing, Bill Watterson draws much better than most of the present-day comic-strip artists.

The Far Side was another great as well. Doug Larson's take on everyday situations (as well as his obsession with cows) is really funny, and sometimes, while speaking with other people, the general bizarreness that could have been pops up in my head, and I have to keep myself from laughing out loud during serious discussions.

For comics which are still running, I like Dilbert, Doonesbury, Foxtrot, Sherman's Lagoon and Sinfest (all of which can be found on the Internet). Doonesbury is especially political and intellectual - my kind of humour - so I'd highly recommend that one for anyone around my age group just starting to discover the wonder of comics.

And just for the record, I have rarely found Charlie Brown to be amusing.

I have to admit that my web programming skills leave much to be designed. I've been meaning to do something to this for a while - make the navigation a bit easier, change the colour schemes, figure out how to add a little comments page and really, just small teeny things that would make me happy, but I have to confess, till now, I haven't a clue as to how to do any of what I've just said. So, I will remain a copycat, and thank the person who came up with this template. Meanwhile, I'll just sit and watch the links leading to the archives grow until I don't know how much before I finally learn how to change that.

You are the Low-Fidelity All-Star. You were born with your cool, and it's
totally natural. You run the gamut from Hipster Supreme (only they can
ingest as much coffee as you) to the geeky hipster (Mario Kart, anyone?).


What Kind of Hipster Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I, in my infinite cluelessness, will admit that I am pleased by the above. However, what the heck is a hipster?

What is it about me that whenever anyone says anything nice or good about me that I automatically dismiss it? I've been told that I'm smart and intelligent and capable of better - by many many people my entire life. Sometimes, when I'm feeling really down, that's all I cling to - the fact that so many people have told me that before so there must be something in me that I'm simply not seeing, but at least it's there, and it's real. Lately, I haven't been feeling at all smart. Rather, I'm feeling unmotivated and just want to get a nice long rest somewhere in New York, just chilling and watching concerts and musicals and taking in the great world of American shopping. Of course, that's just not possible right now. Either I wait for six months before that becomes possible - although I don't know if I can hold out for that long - or I just drop everything I'm doing and indulge in what I've been wanting to do for such a long time - visit the US, most especially New York City, New Orleans, Chicago and San Francisco.

Why am I so bitter right now? Well, I just got my training results back and they weren't good. More importantly, my training programme cohort was whittled by one. Not me, thankfully, but scary and demoralising nonetheless.

A study by the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology has apparently shown that violent music boosts aggressive thoughts, and that listening to music with violent and aggressive lyrics, may not be healthy and anger-relieving after all.

This may explain the feelings of intense anger and frustration I feel sometimes. On the other hand, it just may be normal young adult angst and frustration. Fortunately, the study notes that it is possible that the effects of the music may last for a fairly short time.

I guess I'm not on my way to becoming a raging homicidal psychopath. Gosh and durn.

Manchester United has won the English Premiership!

WOOOOO!

I wouldn't have believed it - they were so far behind at one time and Arsenal looked to be unbeatable, but man, did Man Utd manage to pull it off!

I'm trying my best to be like Man Utd - or at least, the Man Utd that won the title - they never gave up, no matter how bad the odds, and they still performed well under pressure.

I went CD-shopping today and picked up a bargain - Music for Dreams, a 2-CD set edited by Kenneth Broger, apparently Scandinavia's answer to Pete Tong.

Mr. Broger, I don't know who your publicist is, but if I were you, I'd advise you to let him know that that tagline is not good, especially for those with any knowledge of good DJs.

Anyway, it cost me approximately four quid. I love sales.

I've watched two good movies lately - 24 Hour Party People and 25th Hour. Other than the numbers and reference to time, these two movies have nothing in common.

Anyway, without further ado, let me launch into my customary critique. 24 Hour Party People, about the rise and fall of Tony Wilson's Factory Records in Manchester, was a pretty decent observation on punk music and rave culture in the UK. Centred around Tony Wilson, apparently the last of the music entrepreneurs, being someone who doesn't believe in tying a musician down with the need to make money-making records, and allowing them full creative liberties, the film also touches on the lives of Ian Curtis (lead singer of Joy Division who committed suicide in 1980) and Shaun Ryder (lead singer of Happy Mondays). The documentary-film is done nicely, at times feeling exactly like a film, and at other times - when Tony speaks directly to the audience - exactly like a documentary. The soundtrack is spot on, with the music coming on at just the right moments. The film also captures the birth of rave culture, the first time when clubbers went clubbing to listen to the DJ, the medium of the music, rather than the creators or the producers of the music itself. Wilson's Hacienda club in Manchester looked brilliant, exactly like how I'd imagine a UK superclub to look like and while watching the film, I started to feel really bad that I don't buy that many drinks when I go clubbing as selling drinks is how clubs make money. Overall, the show was funny and in a way, sort of educational.

25th Hour, on the other hand, was gripping and touching at times. The film chronicles the Monty Brogan's last 24 hours in New York before beginning his seven-year prison sentence for drug-dealing. As a movie directed by Spike Lee, my friend didn't think it was a movie suitable for females, but I watched it anyway. For one thing, I really do like Edward Norton's acting. He was brilliant in Fight Club and American History X, so I didn't think he'd let me down here, and indeed, the five minute angry rant that he directs at every person in New York is fascinating. The emotions in his voice are so powerful that you don't even have to watch the screen in order to get caught up by the scene. I felt so sad for him that he was going to prison that I found myself rooting for him to run and escape his sentence. At the same time, I was acutely aware that were he just another statistic, I'd be like, "Drug-dealing b*****d, he deserves to go to jail for ruining young lives!" I found the really American parts of the show a tad overdone. A review I read said that it was symbolism, showing how fragile America has become after the September 11 attacks by illustrating how powerless Monty became after his arrest and conviction. I didn't see that at all, and although the direct focus on the devasted World Trade Centre site unnerved me a little, I didn't find it relevant to the movie. Nevertheless, Norton's acting was spot on, and so was most of the editing. I'd like to read the novel now. Should make for interesting reading.

On another note, Anna Paquin's Mary D'Annunzio was really sexy in the film, with her smoky eyes and all. In the club scene, she looked especially hot, and made me wish (yet again) that I could carry that look off... and even better, that attitude - that whole "Get over here, I want you. I can make your world rock and you know it!" kind of attitude. Looking in the mirror... I don't think so. I wouldn't even dare wear the outfit she wears to school!