Where belief is born
Thursday June 30, 2005
Alok Jha
The Guardian
Belief can make people do the strangest things. At one level, it provides a moral framework, sets preferences and steers relationships. On another, it can be devastating. Belief can manifest itself as prejudice or persuade someone to blow up themselves and others in the name of a political cause.
"In the West, most of our physical needs are provided for. We have a level of luxury and civilisation that is pretty much unparalleled," says Kathleen Taylor, a neuroscientist at Oxford University. "That leaves us with a lot more leisure and more space in our heads for thinking."
Beliefs and ideas therefore become our currency, says Taylor. Society is no longer a question of simple survival; it is about choice of companions and views, pressures, ideas, options and preferences.
Thursday, June 30, 2005
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
Went to the new Carl's Jr outlet at Marina Square to check out their burgers. Although I didn't feel all that hungry, I opted for a Guacamole Bacon Cheeseburger which turned out to be the world's largest burger ever.
It was the best burger I'd ever eaten.
It was the best burger I'd ever eaten.
When I came across this in today's New Paper, I thought to myself, "how very true." I've been treating my family rather badly, I realise.
I ran into a stranger as he passed by,
"Oh excuse me please" was my reply.
He said, "Please excuse me too;
I wasn't watching for you."
We were very polite, this stranger and I.
We went on our way and we said goodbye.
But at home a different story is told,
How we treat our loved ones, young and old.
Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
My son stood beside me very still.
When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
"Move out of the way," I said with a frown.
He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.
While I lay awake in bed,
God's still small voice came to me and said,
"While dealing with a stranger, common courtesy you use,
but the family you love, you seem to abuse”.
Go and look on the kitchen floor,
You'll find some flowers there by the door.
Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.
He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes."
By this time, I felt very small,
And now my tears began to fall.
I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
"Wake up, little one, wake up," I said.
"Are these the flowers you picked for me?"
He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree.
I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue.
I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
I shouldn't have yelled at you that way."
He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay.
I love you anyway."
I said, "Son, I love you too,
and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."
I ran into a stranger as he passed by,
"Oh excuse me please" was my reply.
He said, "Please excuse me too;
I wasn't watching for you."
We were very polite, this stranger and I.
We went on our way and we said goodbye.
But at home a different story is told,
How we treat our loved ones, young and old.
Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
My son stood beside me very still.
When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
"Move out of the way," I said with a frown.
He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.
While I lay awake in bed,
God's still small voice came to me and said,
"While dealing with a stranger, common courtesy you use,
but the family you love, you seem to abuse”.
Go and look on the kitchen floor,
You'll find some flowers there by the door.
Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.
He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes."
By this time, I felt very small,
And now my tears began to fall.
I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
"Wake up, little one, wake up," I said.
"Are these the flowers you picked for me?"
He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree.
I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue.
I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
I shouldn't have yelled at you that way."
He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay.
I love you anyway."
I said, "Son, I love you too,
and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."
It never fails to astound me how clueless some people can be. You've managed to drive 1/3 of the team away while a few others have tried to escape and failed. And yet, in spite of the constant cloud of doom and despair hovering over the remaining people, you - in your complete obliviousness and your goldfish-esque memory - assume that just because what was once done with a complete team is now being - barely, carelessly - done with a team at 2/3 strength - that everything's all right, that things are getting better.
How can you be so blind and have managed to survive this long?
How can you be so blind and have managed to survive this long?
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
As of today, my three closest friends in the company have resigned. One left in March, another in June and the most recent will leave end of July.
I once remarked that should the day come that two of them left, I would leave not soon after because the hell hole that is my workplace isn't worth it without their presence.
My time should be coming soon.
If you're wondering why I want to leave, besides being underpaid, overworked and incredibly underappreciated, friends and other things that tell me "[my] IQ is significantly more powerful than the average for your salary bracket. Demand a pay rise while you still have your faculties" (from the Guardian's "Are You Too Smart For Your Salary?" quiz) don't help.
I once remarked that should the day come that two of them left, I would leave not soon after because the hell hole that is my workplace isn't worth it without their presence.
My time should be coming soon.
If you're wondering why I want to leave, besides being underpaid, overworked and incredibly underappreciated, friends and other things that tell me "[my] IQ is significantly more powerful than the average for your salary bracket. Demand a pay rise while you still have your faculties" (from the Guardian's "Are You Too Smart For Your Salary?" quiz) don't help.
Monday, June 27, 2005
Women's Brains Really Are Blown By Orgasms
Yahoo! News
"An orgasm is literally a mind-blowing experience for a woman, scientists have revealed. Much of her brain shuts down when she reaches a sexual climax."
"And there could be a connection with the aphrodisiac effect of alcohol.
'Alcohol brings down the fear level,' said Dr Holstege. 'Everyone knows if you give alcohol to a woman it makes things easier.'"
That explains a lot.
Yahoo! News
"An orgasm is literally a mind-blowing experience for a woman, scientists have revealed. Much of her brain shuts down when she reaches a sexual climax."
"And there could be a connection with the aphrodisiac effect of alcohol.
'Alcohol brings down the fear level,' said Dr Holstege. 'Everyone knows if you give alcohol to a woman it makes things easier.'"
That explains a lot.
Sunday, June 26, 2005
So I ended up going to km8 with some friends to get my mind off things. I drank a White Russian, a Corona and a Strawberry Daiquiri and basically confirmed that I am indeed allergic to alcohol, but that I'll still drink anyway. After that, I went home, fell asleep watching my tape of The O.C., woke up at 8 pm with a hangover, got some dinner (no solids, felt nauseated), continued to watch Lost and then C.S.I and basically got no work done whatsoever.
Whee.
Whee.
You know you've fallen when you feel incredibly happy just watching your eclectic music-loving date turn into the indie-version of a Mambosexual at Poptart.
Further signs you've fallen: When you watch your date get hugged by the scores of old (female) friends who haven't seen him in a while, and your heart aches just that little bit, wondering whether this is really meant to be because the two of you are just so different, and that maybe, you should get out of this while you still can, because despite how exclusive you two are, he's hesitant to call you his girlfriend because he still has his doubts, just the same as you.
And maybe guys don't get why females feel that way, but you've got to understand, what's the point of being exclusive when you don't get any of the so-called benefits that come with being that? And I'm honestly not at all sure just how far anyone should go with someone you're not having a serious relationship with. It's just like having a relationship with a married man. He gets everything; you get nothing in the end.
But more importantly, when the person who's all "in life, you need to take some risks" is the one having doubts... what hope do I have? Yes, I've taken my fair share of risks in the past, knowing full well what I was getting myself in for. I still bear the scars. But, this could be one which I might want to get out of before I hurl myself off the cliff.
And if you ever read this, please know that this isn't about you. It's about how you make me feel. And that scares me incredibly.
P.S. I feel I should comment on my first Poptart so as to do justice to the DJs playing last night. I don't know what kind of music is played normally but last night was quite fun. Listening to British indie and alternative always makes me happy, especially when the songs played include James - Sit Down and my once-upon-a-time-I-couldn't-live-without-it song, New Order - Regret.
Further signs you've fallen: When you watch your date get hugged by the scores of old (female) friends who haven't seen him in a while, and your heart aches just that little bit, wondering whether this is really meant to be because the two of you are just so different, and that maybe, you should get out of this while you still can, because despite how exclusive you two are, he's hesitant to call you his girlfriend because he still has his doubts, just the same as you.
And maybe guys don't get why females feel that way, but you've got to understand, what's the point of being exclusive when you don't get any of the so-called benefits that come with being that? And I'm honestly not at all sure just how far anyone should go with someone you're not having a serious relationship with. It's just like having a relationship with a married man. He gets everything; you get nothing in the end.
But more importantly, when the person who's all "in life, you need to take some risks" is the one having doubts... what hope do I have? Yes, I've taken my fair share of risks in the past, knowing full well what I was getting myself in for. I still bear the scars. But, this could be one which I might want to get out of before I hurl myself off the cliff.
And if you ever read this, please know that this isn't about you. It's about how you make me feel. And that scares me incredibly.
P.S. I feel I should comment on my first Poptart so as to do justice to the DJs playing last night. I don't know what kind of music is played normally but last night was quite fun. Listening to British indie and alternative always makes me happy, especially when the songs played include James - Sit Down and my once-upon-a-time-I-couldn't-live-without-it song, New Order - Regret.
I watched Swan Lake performed by the Royal Ballet yesterday. And while I'm not a ballet connoisseur (or an opera one at that, as I found out at a recent viewing of Buz Luhrmann's production of Puccini's La Boheme), I felt that the dancers were all incredibly talented. I haven't watched anything with a proper story performed before without any speech or obvious miming so this was most definitely a new experience for me. Unfortunately, I was exhausted and fell asleep more than a couple of times during the performance. I was doing my best to stay awake, but with the lights in the theatre out, I just couldn't keep my eyes open no matter how hard I tried.
But I do have this to say. I'm not a classical music fan either, but the score by Tchaikovsky was fantastic. And the choreography, with the dancers' movements matching the music perfectly, was exquisite. Marianela Nunez as Odile/Odette was incredible. I watched with awe as she spun multiple times en pointe (I'm rather envious of their spotting ability, because I can't spin more than three times without getting very dizzy). Thiago Soares, as Siegfried, was not as spectacular as Nunez, but mostly because I suspect the real star of the show is supposed to be Odile/Odette anyway, so that's to be expected. The chemistry between them is rather good, as my heart melted just a little when Nunez came out for the fourth curtain call and she called for him to come out, and he did, kissing her on the lips, causing the audience to scream wildly.
And that's really all I can say for the show. What can I say? I don't appreciate ballet all that much and more to the point, I was far too tired, a fact illustrated by my falling asleep later while dancing at Poptart.
But I do have this to say. I'm not a classical music fan either, but the score by Tchaikovsky was fantastic. And the choreography, with the dancers' movements matching the music perfectly, was exquisite. Marianela Nunez as Odile/Odette was incredible. I watched with awe as she spun multiple times en pointe (I'm rather envious of their spotting ability, because I can't spin more than three times without getting very dizzy). Thiago Soares, as Siegfried, was not as spectacular as Nunez, but mostly because I suspect the real star of the show is supposed to be Odile/Odette anyway, so that's to be expected. The chemistry between them is rather good, as my heart melted just a little when Nunez came out for the fourth curtain call and she called for him to come out, and he did, kissing her on the lips, causing the audience to scream wildly.
And that's really all I can say for the show. What can I say? I don't appreciate ballet all that much and more to the point, I was far too tired, a fact illustrated by my falling asleep later while dancing at Poptart.
Friday, June 24, 2005
You always hear stories about ignorant Americans, but seriously, sometimes you've got to experience it first-hand to believe it.
I spent a summer in the US working when I was still in uni. My colleagues asked me where I studied. I replied “London” and got the response, “You mean ‘London, Canada'?” And people always seem think Singapore's part of the People's Republic of China.
After a month there, I realised just how bad it was. I’ve met incredibly ignorant Americans who thought Wales was the capital of England… and they were political science majors from an Ivy League university too!
But the worst question I’ve ever been asked by an American? After learning I was from Singapore, a colleague asked me, “So did you work on the assembly lines when you were in China?”
I was sorely tempted to reply, “Yes, in fact, I recognise my handiwork on the shirt you’re wearing now.”
I spent a summer in the US working when I was still in uni. My colleagues asked me where I studied. I replied “London” and got the response, “You mean ‘London, Canada'?” And people always seem think Singapore's part of the People's Republic of China.
After a month there, I realised just how bad it was. I’ve met incredibly ignorant Americans who thought Wales was the capital of England… and they were political science majors from an Ivy League university too!
But the worst question I’ve ever been asked by an American? After learning I was from Singapore, a colleague asked me, “So did you work on the assembly lines when you were in China?”
I was sorely tempted to reply, “Yes, in fact, I recognise my handiwork on the shirt you’re wearing now.”
Thursday, June 23, 2005
One of the best contemporary musical songs around...
Another Day
Rent
ROGER
Who do you think you are?
Barging in on me and my guitar
Little girl -- hey
The door is that way
You better go you know
The fire's out anyway
Take your powder -- take your candle
Your sweet whisper
I just can't handle
Well take your hair in the moonlight
Your brown eyes -- goodbye, goodnight
I should tell you I should tell you
I should tell you I should -- no!
Another time -- another place
Our temperature would climb
There'd be a long embrace
We'd do another dance
It'd be another play
Looking for romance?
Come back another day
Another day
MIMI
The heart may freeze or it can burn
The pain will ease if I can learn
There is no future
There is no past
I live this moment as my last
There's only us
There's only this
Forget regret
Or life is yours to miss
No other road
No other way
No day but today
ROGER
Excuse me if I'm off track
But if you're so wise
Then tell me -- why do you need smack?
Take your needle
Take your fancy prayer
And don't forget
Get the moonlight out of your hair
Long ago -- you might've lit up my heart
But the fire's dead -- ain't never ever gonna start
Another time -- another place
The words would only rhyme
We'd be in outer space
It'd be another song
We'd sing another way
You wanna prove me wrong?
Come back another day
Another day
MIMI
There's only yes
Only tonight
We must let go
To know what's right
No other course
No other way
No day but today
MIMI AND OTHERS
I can't control
My destiny
I trust my soul
My only goal is just
To be
There's only now
There's only here
Give in to love
Or live in fear
No other path
No other way
No day but today...
ROGER
Control your temper
She doesn't see
Who says that there's a soul?
Just let me be...
Who do you think you are?
Barging in on me and my guitar
Little girl, hey
The door is that way
The fire's out anyway
ALL
No day but today
No day but today
No day but today
No day but today
No day but today
ROGER
Take your powder; take your candle
Take your brown eyes, your pretty smile, your silhouette
Another time, another place
Another rhyme, a warm embrace
Another dance, another way
Another chance, another day
Another Day
Rent
ROGER
Who do you think you are?
Barging in on me and my guitar
Little girl -- hey
The door is that way
You better go you know
The fire's out anyway
Take your powder -- take your candle
Your sweet whisper
I just can't handle
Well take your hair in the moonlight
Your brown eyes -- goodbye, goodnight
I should tell you I should tell you
I should tell you I should -- no!
Another time -- another place
Our temperature would climb
There'd be a long embrace
We'd do another dance
It'd be another play
Looking for romance?
Come back another day
Another day
MIMI
The heart may freeze or it can burn
The pain will ease if I can learn
There is no future
There is no past
I live this moment as my last
There's only us
There's only this
Forget regret
Or life is yours to miss
No other road
No other way
No day but today
ROGER
Excuse me if I'm off track
But if you're so wise
Then tell me -- why do you need smack?
Take your needle
Take your fancy prayer
And don't forget
Get the moonlight out of your hair
Long ago -- you might've lit up my heart
But the fire's dead -- ain't never ever gonna start
Another time -- another place
The words would only rhyme
We'd be in outer space
It'd be another song
We'd sing another way
You wanna prove me wrong?
Come back another day
Another day
MIMI
There's only yes
Only tonight
We must let go
To know what's right
No other course
No other way
No day but today
MIMI AND OTHERS
I can't control
My destiny
I trust my soul
My only goal is just
To be
There's only now
There's only here
Give in to love
Or live in fear
No other path
No other way
No day but today...
ROGER
Control your temper
She doesn't see
Who says that there's a soul?
Just let me be...
Who do you think you are?
Barging in on me and my guitar
Little girl, hey
The door is that way
The fire's out anyway
ALL
No day but today
No day but today
No day but today
No day but today
No day but today
ROGER
Take your powder; take your candle
Take your brown eyes, your pretty smile, your silhouette
Another time, another place
Another rhyme, a warm embrace
Another dance, another way
Another chance, another day
Once upon a time, in a galaxy far far away, when purchasing a lipstick from MAC, the sales lady at Tangs told me, "Your lips are quite nice. Like Shu Qi's. Except hers are like ten times 'poutier'."
What an incongruous comment, I thought. You could say that about any other part of my anatomy and that would still apply.
What an incongruous comment, I thought. You could say that about any other part of my anatomy and that would still apply.
Photo taken from Shuqi.org
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
No Ordinary Morning
Behind The Sun
Chicane feat. Tracy Ackerman
If there was nothing that I could say
Turned your back and you just walked away
Leaves me numb inside I think of you
Together is all I ever knew
We moved too fast but I had no sign
I would try to turn the hands of time
I looked to you for a reason why
The love we had passed me by
And as the sun would set you would rise
Fall from the sky into paradise
Is there no light in your heart for me
You've closed your eyes, you don't longer see
There were no lies between me and you
You said nothing of what you knew
But there was still something in your eyes
Left me helpless and paralysed
You could give a million reasons
Change the world and change the tides
Could not give me the secrets
Of your heart and of your mind
In the darkness that surrounds me
Now there is no peace of mind
Your careless words undo me
Leave the thought of us behind
Behind The Sun
Chicane feat. Tracy Ackerman
If there was nothing that I could say
Turned your back and you just walked away
Leaves me numb inside I think of you
Together is all I ever knew
We moved too fast but I had no sign
I would try to turn the hands of time
I looked to you for a reason why
The love we had passed me by
And as the sun would set you would rise
Fall from the sky into paradise
Is there no light in your heart for me
You've closed your eyes, you don't longer see
There were no lies between me and you
You said nothing of what you knew
But there was still something in your eyes
Left me helpless and paralysed
You could give a million reasons
Change the world and change the tides
Could not give me the secrets
Of your heart and of your mind
In the darkness that surrounds me
Now there is no peace of mind
Your careless words undo me
Leave the thought of us behind
Although there's not likely to be an occasion for me to ever use these, I still thought it'd be fun to make a list of ideal make out music, otherwise known as music that gets you in the mood, whether it's the mood for cuddling, kissing or... more. I've tried to divide all of these into five categories, but realistically speaking, some of them do overlap. Nevertheless, here's a list of songs that I think are pretty damn good for getting some action. Some are a little depressing to listen to when you're by yourself, but I happen to like sad songs that speak of yearning. What better emotion to inspire in your intended target?
On The Dance Floor
I'd love to hear these songs on the dance floor. If you're my partner, you should watch out.
Any of these will put you in good stead for the whole night.
These songs are so sexy, you can't help but give in to your instincts... especially when the climax kicks in!
These songs are sweetly, understatedly sexy. More for love than for lust.
Or should that be after the deed? Perfect for cuddling and other stuff.
On The Dance Floor
I'd love to hear these songs on the dance floor. If you're my partner, you should watch out.
- Unkle - In A State (Sasha Remix)
- Faithless - Salva Mea
- Energy 52 - Cafe del Mar
- Paul Oakenfold - Southern Sun
- Armin van Buuren - Burned with Desire
- Motorcycle - As The Rush Comes
- Rank 1 - Breathing
- Delerium - Silence
- Sasha - Baja (also for Making Out)
Any of these will put you in good stead for the whole night.
- Air - Moon Safari (album)
- Massive Attack - Mezzanine (but any of their albums pre-100th Window will do, really)
- City of Angels - Soundtrack
These songs are so sexy, you can't help but give in to your instincts... especially when the climax kicks in!
- Godsmack - Voodoo
- U2 - With or Without You
- U2 - All I Want Is You
- Chicane - Saltwater (If I happen to hear this while on the dance floor... well, look out!)
- Paula Cole - Feelin' Love
- Meredith Brooks - What Would Happen...?
- Dido - Here With Me
- Radiohead - Street Spirit
- Mazzy Star - Into Dust
- Depeche Mode - Enjoy The Silence (Mike Shinoda Reinterpretation)
- Lamb - Gorecki
- Gotan Project - Santa Maria
These songs are sweetly, understatedly sexy. More for love than for lust.
- U2 - Bad
- U2 - Stay (Faraway, So Close!)
- Creed - Higher
- Dave Matthews Band - Crash Into Me
- Damien Rice - Blower's Daughter
- Fiona Apple - Please Send Me Someone To Love
- Norah Jones - Come Away With Me
- Norah Jones - Turn Me On
- Maroon 5 - She Will Be Loved
- Goo Goo Dolls - Iris
- Coldplay - God Put A Smile Upon Your Face
- John Mayer - Your Body Is A Wonderland
- Sophie B Hawkins - Damn, I Wish I Were Your Lover
- Dave Matthews Band - Crush
- Gigolo Aunts - My Favourite Regret
Or should that be after the deed? Perfect for cuddling and other stuff.
- Faithless - Don't Leave
- Evanescence - My Immortal
- Sneaker Pimps - Spin Spin Sugar
- Mazzy Star - Fade Into You
- Sade - By Your Side
- Fiona Apple - Criminal
- Bush - Letting the Cables Sleep
- DJ Tiesto - Close To You
- Coldplay - In My Place
- Coldplay - The Scientist
- Depeche Mode - Somebody
- Chicane - No Ordinary Morning
Monday, June 20, 2005
I didn't use to like Depeche Mode. Of all the New Wave bands, I only listened to New Order, not Pet Shop Boys, not The Cure, not Duran Duran and certainly not Depeche Mode. The only song I liked by them was Somebody, which is like, everyone's favourite.
Then after James Zabiela dropped Enjoy The Silence, where I had the distinct pleasure of listening to my guy sing along to it while holding me in his arms, I decided to hunt down the single just so I could listen to it at work. Instead of finding the original, I stumbled across a reinterpretation by Mike Shinoda. Yes, the MC of Linkin Park.
I was initially a little apprehensive about it because Linkin Park's treatment of songs doesn't vary very much. Heavy crashing something or other a minute into the song. And true enough, it's the case with Shinoda's reinterpretation... except that it's brilliant. Go listen to it here. The music video isn't bad either.
Then after James Zabiela dropped Enjoy The Silence, where I had the distinct pleasure of listening to my guy sing along to it while holding me in his arms, I decided to hunt down the single just so I could listen to it at work. Instead of finding the original, I stumbled across a reinterpretation by Mike Shinoda. Yes, the MC of Linkin Park.
I was initially a little apprehensive about it because Linkin Park's treatment of songs doesn't vary very much. Heavy crashing something or other a minute into the song. And true enough, it's the case with Shinoda's reinterpretation... except that it's brilliant. Go listen to it here. The music video isn't bad either.
Sunday, June 19, 2005
A friend offered me some advice on my current romantic situation (in response to my comment that I'm not head-over-heels for the guy I'm dating now, but that I still like him) that idealistic as it sounds, head-over-heels is a necessary part of any relationship, even the short-term ones. Naturally, that made me think - maybe a little too much - about what I'm doing, where we're going. I mean, like it or not, I'm not about to sleep with him. And that, if that's the case, maybe I shouldn't be doing this, and should just stop it here and now.
And then, he turned up last night - late and unannounced - and I felt happy to see him. Not ecstatically happy, but shyly happy. And it just feel rather nice holding him and being held by him. And I found myself laughing when he and his friends got into a mock fight, pai kia style.
So there it is. I've found my reason for why I'm still letting this continue. There may not be crazy, heartstoppingly dizziness, but still, there's a hint of what could become that... just something.
And then, he turned up last night - late and unannounced - and I felt happy to see him. Not ecstatically happy, but shyly happy. And it just feel rather nice holding him and being held by him. And I found myself laughing when he and his friends got into a mock fight, pai kia style.
So there it is. I've found my reason for why I'm still letting this continue. There may not be crazy, heartstoppingly dizziness, but still, there's a hint of what could become that... just something.
James Zabiela was a bit of a let-down last night. I mean, he was still good, but just that, the hype was so much that we were all anticipating more than we got. That, and the fact that idiotic people had complained about his scratching too much the last time he came, so he toned down. People, people, people. His scratching's one of the best parts of his set. Morons. But there were unexpected moments of brilliance, such as when he played remixes of New Order - Blue Monday, KLF - What Time Is Love, Depeche Mode - Enjoy The Silence and the best one of all, Lamb - Gorecki.
So it turned out I was one of the other highlights of the night. Because I was wearing that incredibly revealing top I purchased almost a year ago from Punkyfish.
Note to self: buy smaller strapless bra so that I don't have to tug my top down every five minutes or so to cover it up.
So it turned out I was one of the other highlights of the night. Because I was wearing that incredibly revealing top I purchased almost a year ago from Punkyfish.
Note to self: buy smaller strapless bra so that I don't have to tug my top down every five minutes or so to cover it up.
Saturday, June 18, 2005
In spite of my preference for well-spoken English, I will admit that there are times I lapse into Singlish for a number of reasons. It brings me comfort, it's fun to listen to every once in a while, and most importantly, it's incredibly effective when you need to get your meaning across in a minimal number of words.
For instance, instead of saying, "what should we do now?" after one has listed a bunch of options, one can opt to use "so how?" Another more recent example is "whatever lah!" in place "it really doesn't matter what you choose as it makes no difference."
My Indonesian colleague has been incredibly tickled by the expediency and efficiency of using Singlish to communicate with my fellow Singaporeans. The only problem in attempting to educate her in the proper usage of Singlish - and a problem frequently faced by other non-locals, I might add - is how to explain the proper placement of "lah", "leh", "lor" and "ah" and how to pronounce the non-English words properly. For some reason, foreigners, when attempting to show bond with us, tend to add "lah" to the end of every sentence, and use "wah lau" (an expression similar to how "oh my god" is usually used) in response to something we say.
The thing is, there are, believe it or not, instances when a "lah" at the end of a sentence sounds terribly out of place. It is one of the most common words heard out of a typical Singaporean's mouth, I'll admit. We say things like "okay lah", "no lah" and "you know lah" very often. But the placement of "leh" and "lah" can alter the tone and sometimes even the meaning of the phrase. Adding a "lah" and a "leh" to "don't like that" can alter the tone. In both cases, the meaning is the same: "Don't be like that." However, "don't like that lah" sounds more playful and casual to me, whereas "don't like that leh" sounds slightly more pleading and apologetic.
As for "ah", the only instance that crosses my mind right now is its use in "really ah?", which means, well, "really?" And the response to that, in my case, is usually "okay lor" which means "okay". Note here that "okay lah" doesn't quite go as a response to the "really ah?" It's hard to explain but to those well-versed in the usage of Singlish, it comes naturally. The sound isn't right. It just isn't.
Links:
thedean's faculty on how much time could be saved if we all spoke Singlish.
mr brown on the meaning of lah. (42! 42! Oh... the meaning of lah. Pai seh. My bad.)
For instance, instead of saying, "what should we do now?" after one has listed a bunch of options, one can opt to use "so how?" Another more recent example is "whatever lah!" in place "it really doesn't matter what you choose as it makes no difference."
My Indonesian colleague has been incredibly tickled by the expediency and efficiency of using Singlish to communicate with my fellow Singaporeans. The only problem in attempting to educate her in the proper usage of Singlish - and a problem frequently faced by other non-locals, I might add - is how to explain the proper placement of "lah", "leh", "lor" and "ah" and how to pronounce the non-English words properly. For some reason, foreigners, when attempting to show bond with us, tend to add "lah" to the end of every sentence, and use "wah lau" (an expression similar to how "oh my god" is usually used) in response to something we say.
The thing is, there are, believe it or not, instances when a "lah" at the end of a sentence sounds terribly out of place. It is one of the most common words heard out of a typical Singaporean's mouth, I'll admit. We say things like "okay lah", "no lah" and "you know lah" very often. But the placement of "leh" and "lah" can alter the tone and sometimes even the meaning of the phrase. Adding a "lah" and a "leh" to "don't like that" can alter the tone. In both cases, the meaning is the same: "Don't be like that." However, "don't like that lah" sounds more playful and casual to me, whereas "don't like that leh" sounds slightly more pleading and apologetic.
As for "ah", the only instance that crosses my mind right now is its use in "really ah?", which means, well, "really?" And the response to that, in my case, is usually "okay lor" which means "okay". Note here that "okay lah" doesn't quite go as a response to the "really ah?" It's hard to explain but to those well-versed in the usage of Singlish, it comes naturally. The sound isn't right. It just isn't.
Links:
thedean's faculty on how much time could be saved if we all spoke Singlish.
mr brown on the meaning of lah. (42! 42! Oh... the meaning of lah. Pai seh. My bad.)
Friday, June 17, 2005
Worst album title ever (aka so bad it's good)
Don't Techno For An Answer (Vol. 2): Save The Last Trance For Me
Don't Techno For An Answer (Vol. 2): Save The Last Trance For Me
Basement Jaxx have been chosen to replace Kylie Minogue as the headlining act for Glastonbury, which takes place next weekend.
Indeed. Basement Jaxx, in my opinion, are one of the best live performers ever. And Glastonbury! It's a once-in-a-lifetime experience. So why am I stuck in the office doing incredibly meaningless, non-value-adding work?
And my brother is going to watch U2 tomorrow. There's just enough time for me to rush to the airport, purchase a ticket and grab the next flight to London and get there in time to watch it. If only I brought my passport out...
To those who had never witnessed the Jaxx spectacle live, it was a surprise
- but to those who had, it was clear Basement Jaxx would be the perfect
replacement. Canny enough to realise that watching two middle-aged blokes
shuffle about on stage twiddling knobs equals an hour of boredom for your
average punter, the pair enlist a cohort of performers, dancers and musicians to
turn a Basement Jaxx show into a proper performance. "This year we're bringing a
drummer, a percussionist, lots of singers - five or six, I think - and a brass
trio," says Ratcliffe. There were no complicated negotiations between Worthy
Farm and the Jaxx camp, adds Buxton. "They said: 'Do you want to move up the
bill?' and we said: 'Yeah'."
Indeed. Basement Jaxx, in my opinion, are one of the best live performers ever. And Glastonbury! It's a once-in-a-lifetime experience. So why am I stuck in the office doing incredibly meaningless, non-value-adding work?
And my brother is going to watch U2 tomorrow. There's just enough time for me to rush to the airport, purchase a ticket and grab the next flight to London and get there in time to watch it. If only I brought my passport out...
One of the things I miss most about England is quality radio. But with Joe Augustin back on the airwaves at Power 98, I can safely say that the standard of Singapore radio has been raised considerably. Not only do we have a DJ whose accent isn't overpoweringly Singaporean, but - and this is the best part - his brand of humour is intelligent and incredibly spontaneous too.
Take this gem from a few days ago, when he and co-host Maggie Lim somehow got to talking about how certain kinds of fruit would sound if they could talk. According to Joe, a starfruit would speak in a gay accent. Really, responded Maggie, how about... and she started throwing different kinds of fruit at him (and by that, I mean names of fruit, not literally). And he responded with ease. Gado-gado, he said, means "fight" in Indonesian, so that's why you don't hear anything other than general squabbling from them. He can't figure out how the peanuts got involved though. "Durians?" she asked. "Durians don't talk," he batted back, seemingly without needing to think. His delivery was priceless.
I hadn't realised how good you are on your own, Joe. You are so much better than your ex-partner and you've made my mornings a little brighter.
Take this gem from a few days ago, when he and co-host Maggie Lim somehow got to talking about how certain kinds of fruit would sound if they could talk. According to Joe, a starfruit would speak in a gay accent. Really, responded Maggie, how about... and she started throwing different kinds of fruit at him (and by that, I mean names of fruit, not literally). And he responded with ease. Gado-gado, he said, means "fight" in Indonesian, so that's why you don't hear anything other than general squabbling from them. He can't figure out how the peanuts got involved though. "Durians?" she asked. "Durians don't talk," he batted back, seemingly without needing to think. His delivery was priceless.
I hadn't realised how good you are on your own, Joe. You are so much better than your ex-partner and you've made my mornings a little brighter.
Thursday, June 16, 2005
Rob Thomas on Life (from the Show - A Night in the Life of Matchbox 20 DVD before the band sings Unwell):
"In 31 years, I've found out that everybody in the world, is a little bit f*cked up. And it's ok, it's ok. But when you're young, you think it's just you. You're at home, you're trying to hide it, you figure maybe you'll grow out of it, maybe sooner or later you'll get like all the other people. What you don't know when you're young, is that it's everybody, man. Everybody's a little bit f*cked up. And when you get older, you have two kinds of people: You have the fortunate people, who realise it early on, they let their freak flag fly, they have a good time, they don't think too hard about it, they don't take theirselves too seriously. And then there's the poor bastards on the other side, who are still trying to play it cool, everyday: 'I'm not f*cked up.' So you know, it's ok to be a little f*cked up every now and then."
"In 31 years, I've found out that everybody in the world, is a little bit f*cked up. And it's ok, it's ok. But when you're young, you think it's just you. You're at home, you're trying to hide it, you figure maybe you'll grow out of it, maybe sooner or later you'll get like all the other people. What you don't know when you're young, is that it's everybody, man. Everybody's a little bit f*cked up. And when you get older, you have two kinds of people: You have the fortunate people, who realise it early on, they let their freak flag fly, they have a good time, they don't think too hard about it, they don't take theirselves too seriously. And then there's the poor bastards on the other side, who are still trying to play it cool, everyday: 'I'm not f*cked up.' So you know, it's ok to be a little f*cked up every now and then."
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
I found a more professional translation of Zazie - Sur Toi than I can offer with my not-yet-fluent level of French. And I was right. It sounds beautiful in French and even after being translated, still retains its beauty.
Sur Toi
Zazie
J'écris sur ce que j'endure
Les petites morts, sur les blessure
J'écris ma peur
Mon manque d'amour
J'écris du coeur
Mais c'est toujours
I write on that which I endure
The little deaths, on the wounds
I write my fear
My lack of love
I write from the heart
But it's always
Sur ce que je n'ai pas pu dire
Pas pu vivre, pas su retenir
J'écris en vers
Et contre tous
C'est toujours l'enfer
Qui me pousse
On that which I was unable to say
Unable to live, unable to keep
I write in verse
And against all
It's always hell
Which pushes me
A jeter l'encre sur le papier
La faute sur ceux qui m'ont laissée
Ecrire, c'est toujours reculer
L'instant où tout s'est écroulé
To hurl the ink on the paper,
The blame on those who left me
Writing is always moving back
To the moment where everything crumbled
On n'écrit pas
Sur ce qu'on aime
Sur ce qui ne pose pas
Problème
Voilà pourquoi
Je n'écris pas
Sur toi
Rassure-toi
One doesn't write
On what they love
On what doesn't pose
Any problems
This is why
I don't write
On you
Don't worry
J'écris sur ce qui me blesse
La liste des forces qu'il me reste
Mes kilomètres de vie manquée
De mal en prose, de vers brisés
I write on that which hurts me
The list of strengths that I have left
My miles of wasted life
Pain in prose, broken verses
J'écris comme on miaule sous la lune
Dans la nuit, je trempe ma plume
J'écris l'abcès
J'écris l'absent
J'écris la pluie
Pas le beau temps
I write as one meows under the moon
During the night, I dip my quill
I write the abscess
I write the absent
I write the rain
Not fine weather
J'écris ce qui ne se dit pas
Sur les murs, j'écris sur les toits
Ecrire, c'est toujours revenir
A ceux qui nous ont fait partir
I write that which is not said
On the walls, I write on the roofs
Writing is always going back
To those who made us leave
On n'écrit pas qu'on manque de rien
Qu'on est heureux, que tout va bien
Voilà pourquoi
Je n'écris pas
Sur toi
Rassure-toi
One doesn't write that they lack nothing
That they are happy, that all is well
This is why
I don't write
On you
Don't worry
J'écris quand j'ai mal aux autres
Quand ma peine ressemble à la votre
Quand le monde me fait le gros dos
Je lui fais porter le chapeau
I write when I hurt like the others
When my grief resembles theirs
When the world keeps its head down
I make it take the blame
J'écris le blues indélébile
Ça me paraît moins difficile
De dire à tous plutôt qu'à un
Et d'avoir le mot de la fin
I write indelible blues
That seems easier to me
Telling all rather than one
And having the final word
Il faut qu'elle soit partie déjÃ
Pour écrire "ne me quitte pas"
Qu'ils ne vivent plus sous le même toit
Pour qu'il vienne lui dire qu'il s'en va
It's needed that she have already departed
In order to write "Don't leave me"
That they no longer live under the same roof
So that he comes to tell her that he's off
Pour écrire "ne me quitte pas" makes reference to the famous Jacques Brel song and Pour qu'il vienne lui dire qu'il s'en va makes reference to the Gainsbourg-Birkin song "Je suis venu te dire que je m'en vais". Zazie is saying that the most beautiful love songs have been written loveless. That the girl had already left Brel when he wrote the song and that Gainsbourg and Birkin had broken up when he wrote that song for her.
On n'écrit pas la chance qu'on a
Pas de chanson d'amour quand on en a
Voilà pourquoi, mon amour
Je n'écris rien
Sur toi
Rassure-toi
One doesn't write on their own luck
No love song when they've found someone
This is why, my love
I don't write anything
On you
Don't worry
Sur Toi
Zazie
J'écris sur ce que j'endure
Les petites morts, sur les blessure
J'écris ma peur
Mon manque d'amour
J'écris du coeur
Mais c'est toujours
I write on that which I endure
The little deaths, on the wounds
I write my fear
My lack of love
I write from the heart
But it's always
Sur ce que je n'ai pas pu dire
Pas pu vivre, pas su retenir
J'écris en vers
Et contre tous
C'est toujours l'enfer
Qui me pousse
On that which I was unable to say
Unable to live, unable to keep
I write in verse
And against all
It's always hell
Which pushes me
A jeter l'encre sur le papier
La faute sur ceux qui m'ont laissée
Ecrire, c'est toujours reculer
L'instant où tout s'est écroulé
To hurl the ink on the paper,
The blame on those who left me
Writing is always moving back
To the moment where everything crumbled
On n'écrit pas
Sur ce qu'on aime
Sur ce qui ne pose pas
Problème
Voilà pourquoi
Je n'écris pas
Sur toi
Rassure-toi
One doesn't write
On what they love
On what doesn't pose
Any problems
This is why
I don't write
On you
Don't worry
J'écris sur ce qui me blesse
La liste des forces qu'il me reste
Mes kilomètres de vie manquée
De mal en prose, de vers brisés
I write on that which hurts me
The list of strengths that I have left
My miles of wasted life
Pain in prose, broken verses
J'écris comme on miaule sous la lune
Dans la nuit, je trempe ma plume
J'écris l'abcès
J'écris l'absent
J'écris la pluie
Pas le beau temps
I write as one meows under the moon
During the night, I dip my quill
I write the abscess
I write the absent
I write the rain
Not fine weather
J'écris ce qui ne se dit pas
Sur les murs, j'écris sur les toits
Ecrire, c'est toujours revenir
A ceux qui nous ont fait partir
I write that which is not said
On the walls, I write on the roofs
Writing is always going back
To those who made us leave
On n'écrit pas qu'on manque de rien
Qu'on est heureux, que tout va bien
Voilà pourquoi
Je n'écris pas
Sur toi
Rassure-toi
One doesn't write that they lack nothing
That they are happy, that all is well
This is why
I don't write
On you
Don't worry
J'écris quand j'ai mal aux autres
Quand ma peine ressemble à la votre
Quand le monde me fait le gros dos
Je lui fais porter le chapeau
I write when I hurt like the others
When my grief resembles theirs
When the world keeps its head down
I make it take the blame
J'écris le blues indélébile
Ça me paraît moins difficile
De dire à tous plutôt qu'à un
Et d'avoir le mot de la fin
I write indelible blues
That seems easier to me
Telling all rather than one
And having the final word
Il faut qu'elle soit partie déjÃ
Pour écrire "ne me quitte pas"
Qu'ils ne vivent plus sous le même toit
Pour qu'il vienne lui dire qu'il s'en va
It's needed that she have already departed
In order to write "Don't leave me"
That they no longer live under the same roof
So that he comes to tell her that he's off
Pour écrire "ne me quitte pas" makes reference to the famous Jacques Brel song and Pour qu'il vienne lui dire qu'il s'en va makes reference to the Gainsbourg-Birkin song "Je suis venu te dire que je m'en vais". Zazie is saying that the most beautiful love songs have been written loveless. That the girl had already left Brel when he wrote the song and that Gainsbourg and Birkin had broken up when he wrote that song for her.
On n'écrit pas la chance qu'on a
Pas de chanson d'amour quand on en a
Voilà pourquoi, mon amour
Je n'écris rien
Sur toi
Rassure-toi
One doesn't write on their own luck
No love song when they've found someone
This is why, my love
I don't write anything
On you
Don't worry
Don't try to get me to take my barriers down. Yes, I'm well aware that they're a result of past relationships - with emphasis on the past - but nevertheless, they're up there for my own protection. And the harder you try, the more I'll resist, the more I'll run. They'll come down on their own if you just leave me be. Just give me some time... and space. Please?
My brother wrote to tell us his mobile phone number isn't working for the time being, so we shouldn't call him. Immediately, as a family, we responded.
My mother: Did you pay your bills?
My brother: (testily) Yes, I did. There's a problem with the phone itself.
Me: Did you put it in the washing machine by accident?
My brother: (annoyed) No!
My father: Your phone isn't working. Are you working?
Heh.
My mother: Did you pay your bills?
My brother:
Me: Did you put it in the washing machine by accident?
My brother: (annoyed) No!
My father: Your phone isn't working. Are you working?
Heh.
I don't quite know how to define my relationship with T.. We're definitely not just casually dating, but at the same time, we haven't had "the talk" whereby the boundaries of our relationship have been drawn. As in, are we still allowed to see other people, etc. As far as I'm concerned, as long as there hasn't been any discussion whatsoever about being exclusive, I'm entitled to date any guy I want, although I wouldn't ever put myself in a situation where there'll be two guys I'm dating in the same room.
And yet... he called me "darling" last night.
For some reason, I've a set of carefully defined rules and regulations about relationships, such as anything other than dinner and late night drinks with a guy should not be taken by the guy as a date in the romantic sense, unless clearly specified. In the same vein, my agreeing to go out for coffee or lunch with you doesn't mean I'm interested in you. My agreeing to give someone my contact details likewise doesn't mean I'm interested in that person. The terms of endearment? I call my good friends "dear", and I use "honey" when I'm saying something sarcastic, like "oh, honey, you have no idea." Terms like "sweetie" and "darling" however, are strictly reserved for those I, well... like in the romantic sense. To this day, mymost recent ex-boyfriend and I still call each other "sweetie". The same holds for guys too, I believe, when a friend pointed out that I shouldn't have taken as an additional sign that CO liked me when he started calling me "dear", since that's what friends call each other.
And now, my carefully defined set of rules has gone out the window. I'm not quite sure whether I should be so girlfriend-ly with a person who isn't my boyfriend. After all, what, then, will entice that person to take the relationship to the next level? Not to mention, I want to keep my options open. At the same time, things just seem to be happening too fast. I'm not a great fan of speed, not being able to take them while driving or rollerblading even, and the same holds true about events in my life. Too smooth, too fast. How the heck do I pull the brakes on this thing?
How do I even begin to explain the fears and worries that I have?
And yet... he called me "darling" last night.
For some reason, I've a set of carefully defined rules and regulations about relationships, such as anything other than dinner and late night drinks with a guy should not be taken by the guy as a date in the romantic sense, unless clearly specified. In the same vein, my agreeing to go out for coffee or lunch with you doesn't mean I'm interested in you. My agreeing to give someone my contact details likewise doesn't mean I'm interested in that person. The terms of endearment? I call my good friends "dear", and I use "honey" when I'm saying something sarcastic, like "oh, honey, you have no idea." Terms like "sweetie" and "darling" however, are strictly reserved for those I, well... like in the romantic sense. To this day, mymost recent ex-boyfriend and I still call each other "sweetie". The same holds for guys too, I believe, when a friend pointed out that I shouldn't have taken as an additional sign that CO liked me when he started calling me "dear", since that's what friends call each other.
And now, my carefully defined set of rules has gone out the window. I'm not quite sure whether I should be so girlfriend-ly with a person who isn't my boyfriend. After all, what, then, will entice that person to take the relationship to the next level? Not to mention, I want to keep my options open. At the same time, things just seem to be happening too fast. I'm not a great fan of speed, not being able to take them while driving or rollerblading even, and the same holds true about events in my life. Too smooth, too fast. How the heck do I pull the brakes on this thing?
How do I even begin to explain the fears and worries that I have?
Monday, June 13, 2005
This is a very enjoyable read.
Give it to me straight
Can two men go out for a quiet dinner without looking a bit, well, gay? Or have we moved on from such crass stereotypes in the metrosexual 21st century? Paul Sussman finds out
12th June
The Independent
Not so long ago I was having dinner with a (male) friend of mine - just the two of us in a cosy little Italian restaurant in Soho - when he suddenly started laughing. "God, this all looks a bit gay, doesn't it?" he chuckled, indicating the plastic carnation in the middle of the table, the bottle of sparkling white wine, the tomato salad we were sharing. "I wonder if anyone thinks we're like... you know... a couple?"
(snip)
Worst of all are dinners with my father, an 83-year-old who dresses in what can only be described as "predatory sugar-daddy chic" and invariably ends the meal by clasping my hand across the table and announcing in a tear-choked voice, "I love you, Paul." You can just feel your insides shrivelling as other diners lean into each other and whisper: "So, that's what a rent-boy looks like."
Give it to me straight
Can two men go out for a quiet dinner without looking a bit, well, gay? Or have we moved on from such crass stereotypes in the metrosexual 21st century? Paul Sussman finds out
12th June
The Independent
Not so long ago I was having dinner with a (male) friend of mine - just the two of us in a cosy little Italian restaurant in Soho - when he suddenly started laughing. "God, this all looks a bit gay, doesn't it?" he chuckled, indicating the plastic carnation in the middle of the table, the bottle of sparkling white wine, the tomato salad we were sharing. "I wonder if anyone thinks we're like... you know... a couple?"
(snip)
Worst of all are dinners with my father, an 83-year-old who dresses in what can only be described as "predatory sugar-daddy chic" and invariably ends the meal by clasping my hand across the table and announcing in a tear-choked voice, "I love you, Paul." You can just feel your insides shrivelling as other diners lean into each other and whisper: "So, that's what a rent-boy looks like."
"He seems nice," said my friend. "But be careful. Boys are dangerous."
Indeed they are. After the rollercoaster rides that were my last few relationships, I'm more than a little hesitant about embarking on this one. And to tell the truth, I'm trying to make sense of all that I'm feeling, because... maybe I've gotten use to the headiness of all the drama I usually go through. It's just so strange to have everything go so smoothly, and not have any angst that plagued my previous relationships, including - especially! - the beginning of the two serious ones. I keep having the feeling that something should be going wrong any time now.
Indeed they are. After the rollercoaster rides that were my last few relationships, I'm more than a little hesitant about embarking on this one. And to tell the truth, I'm trying to make sense of all that I'm feeling, because... maybe I've gotten use to the headiness of all the drama I usually go through. It's just so strange to have everything go so smoothly, and not have any angst that plagued my previous relationships, including - especially! - the beginning of the two serious ones. I keep having the feeling that something should be going wrong any time now.
Sunday, June 12, 2005
Congratulations Little Miss Random, you are...
Cowboy Caleb of cowboycaleb.liquidblade.com
You are smart, loyal and sensitive. You are also very caring towards other people and you help them out whenever you can. You are very passionate about your line of work. You fight for your beliefs and if someone doesn't agree with you, you argue your point of view across in a very convincing yet diplomatic manner. For that, you earn respect.
In spite of suffering from the world's worst cough for the past three days, I decided, foolishly or otherwise, to join my friends for a round of drinking and karaoke yesterday night, figuring that the highly recommended Nin Jiom Pei Pa Koa might save my throat from the ravages of loud singing and shouting.
I'm feeling worse today, with my throat burning more than ever and my nose stuffed up. However, I maintain (much as I did on Thursday, the first day of the cough and the day after the free flow of drinks at Velvet) that it was worth it. I did end up having a lot of fun although I was fairly certain I'd wake up the next day, wonder if I really did have such a surreal experience, see all the incriminating photo evidence of the night and then go, "Oh... crap." But that moment has yet to come... mainly because my friends haven't posted their photos online yet. Heh.
My friend, the organiser of this karaoke event, was the centre of a rather large social circle, which included people she knew from junior college, university and clubbing, and friends of their friends. For the first time ever, I contributed to the latter group by inviting a friend, lead singer of a an up-and-coming pub band, to join us. He entertained us tremendously, although he raised the bar a little higher than most participants expected.
Just to qualify, it's not that I don't want my groups of friends to mix. I don't mind them knowing each other, just that my group of secondary school and JC friends... a lot of them go out with Caucasians and some of my friends from other circles - especially the guys - may not be all that comfortable.
And in another first for me, the guy I'm dating now (T.), who thankfully hasn't caused me much rollercoaster-like anxiety compared to the previous guys I've been dating (where dating is defined as going out with, regardless of romantic intention), was there, although I'm not sure if he would have come had I not asked him. I was a little nervous, since aforementioned singer friend and I have also gone out before, but he and I are more just friends than anything else.
In any case, unless he or she was blind, most people probably figured out that yes, there's something going on between T. and I. At one point during the night, we were holding hands under the table, and at another, I jokingly gestured to him when the waitress who was asking me who the subject of my chosen song - the infallible Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You - was. But of course, some people may have been confused because singer-friend and I were talking much of the night and we also did the song together after my friend who was supposed to do it with me bailed.
As I was trying on a new look, I wasn't sure how I looked. I guess I must've looked really smokin', because the moment we got into a cab (trying oh-so-subtly to shoo other people into the cab so we could get our own), he pounced on me, taking me entirely by surprise.
Later on, at Phuture, after a lemon drop and 1.5 lychee martinis, I ended up really close dancing with him, for the first time ever since I've met him, and it felt really comfortable. I also discovered that he's a little too tall to kiss properly even when I'm on standing on my toes. Basket.
[Edit: My friend has now posted about the karaoke session. You can see some photos and her take on the whole night here.]
I'm feeling worse today, with my throat burning more than ever and my nose stuffed up. However, I maintain (much as I did on Thursday, the first day of the cough and the day after the free flow of drinks at Velvet) that it was worth it. I did end up having a lot of fun although I was fairly certain I'd wake up the next day, wonder if I really did have such a surreal experience, see all the incriminating photo evidence of the night and then go, "Oh... crap." But that moment has yet to come... mainly because my friends haven't posted their photos online yet. Heh.
My friend, the organiser of this karaoke event, was the centre of a rather large social circle, which included people she knew from junior college, university and clubbing, and friends of their friends. For the first time ever, I contributed to the latter group by inviting a friend, lead singer of a an up-and-coming pub band, to join us. He entertained us tremendously, although he raised the bar a little higher than most participants expected.
Just to qualify, it's not that I don't want my groups of friends to mix. I don't mind them knowing each other, just that my group of secondary school and JC friends... a lot of them go out with Caucasians and some of my friends from other circles - especially the guys - may not be all that comfortable.
And in another first for me, the guy I'm dating now (T.), who thankfully hasn't caused me much rollercoaster-like anxiety compared to the previous guys I've been dating (where dating is defined as going out with, regardless of romantic intention), was there, although I'm not sure if he would have come had I not asked him. I was a little nervous, since aforementioned singer friend and I have also gone out before, but he and I are more just friends than anything else.
In any case, unless he or she was blind, most people probably figured out that yes, there's something going on between T. and I. At one point during the night, we were holding hands under the table, and at another, I jokingly gestured to him when the waitress who was asking me who the subject of my chosen song - the infallible Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You - was. But of course, some people may have been confused because singer-friend and I were talking much of the night and we also did the song together after my friend who was supposed to do it with me bailed.
As I was trying on a new look, I wasn't sure how I looked. I guess I must've looked really smokin', because the moment we got into a cab (trying oh-so-subtly to shoo other people into the cab so we could get our own), he pounced on me, taking me entirely by surprise.
Later on, at Phuture, after a lemon drop and 1.5 lychee martinis, I ended up really close dancing with him, for the first time ever since I've met him, and it felt really comfortable. I also discovered that he's a little too tall to kiss properly even when I'm on standing on my toes. Basket.
[Edit: My friend has now posted about the karaoke session. You can see some photos and her take on the whole night here.]
Saturday, June 11, 2005
Friend A: Did you know that they found out that elderly people remember the faces of people they met when they were younger far better than those they meet at a later stage in life? It's a scary though.
Friend B: What's so scary about that?
A: When you have grandchildren and find that you remember my face and you can't recognise your grandkids, why don't you come up to me and tell me whether that's scary?
Heh.
Friend B: What's so scary about that?
A: When you have grandchildren and find that you remember my face and you can't recognise your grandkids, why don't you come up to me and tell me whether that's scary?
Heh.
Friday, June 10, 2005
Taken from The Guardian - a review on Thirteen Conversations About One Thing:
Joy Division
Films may help us escape from the daily grind - but can they ever help us find happiness?
By Alain de Botton
Remember the scene in Notting Hill where Julia Roberts, pregnant, leans on Hugh Grant, reading Captain Corelli's Mandolin? ... These scenes tend to be both intensely enjoyable and hugely irritating: enjoyable because they reflect our deep-seated wish for intense, conflict-free love, and irritating because we know these relationships to be untrue to genuine experience. In their lack of realism, the love scenes seem almost to deny us the chance of happiness in our own lives. They humiliate us with the gap they reveal between what we are likely to have tasted and the events on screen. They also leave us feeling sad. Our sadness won't be of the searing kind, more like a blend of joy and melancholy: joy at the happiness before us, melancholy at an awareness of how seldom we are sufficiently blessed to encounter anything of its kind.
Films have often deceived us about what happiness might be like, but in their finest examples, they also provide us with models by which to guide our own confused quests. They have shown us what happiness might look like, so that we'd be more readily able to recognise it when it came our way.
Joy Division
Films may help us escape from the daily grind - but can they ever help us find happiness?
By Alain de Botton
Remember the scene in Notting Hill where Julia Roberts, pregnant, leans on Hugh Grant, reading Captain Corelli's Mandolin? ... These scenes tend to be both intensely enjoyable and hugely irritating: enjoyable because they reflect our deep-seated wish for intense, conflict-free love, and irritating because we know these relationships to be untrue to genuine experience. In their lack of realism, the love scenes seem almost to deny us the chance of happiness in our own lives. They humiliate us with the gap they reveal between what we are likely to have tasted and the events on screen. They also leave us feeling sad. Our sadness won't be of the searing kind, more like a blend of joy and melancholy: joy at the happiness before us, melancholy at an awareness of how seldom we are sufficiently blessed to encounter anything of its kind.
Films have often deceived us about what happiness might be like, but in their finest examples, they also provide us with models by which to guide our own confused quests. They have shown us what happiness might look like, so that we'd be more readily able to recognise it when it came our way.
Thursday, June 09, 2005
I brought my mentor out for lunch yesterday to Restaurant Ember at Hotel 1929, a designer hotel located at Keong Saik St (PG link) and which has been featured in the Washington Post. Ember has received some pretty rave reviews from newspapers and friends alike, so it seemed like a good place to bring my epicure of a mentor.
She ordered the baked cod which turned out fantastic, with just a hint of sweetness, and I ordered their most highly recommended main course, the lamb shank, which was incredibly tender and just fell off the bone. The sauce was a little overwhelming after a while, but still, the lamb was well worth it.
But man, oh, man, nothing could beat the desserts. Much to my disappointment, the frozen banana was unavailable on account of the banana "not [being] frozen but mashed because something happened to the freezer" so we settled for tiramisu (with brandied cherries, my favourite), apple strudel and lavender honey (I love apple strudel/pie/tart/anything), banana tart (made up for the lack of the frozen banana) and the wonderfully rich Valrhona chocolate cake.
After savouring the spectacular desserts, my mentor convinced management to let us go up and see the rooms, which turned out to be nicely designed for a room that age (the building was built in 1929 after all) but incredibly small, much like the size of my London student hall room. The suites were cute, with outdoor bathtubs. One suite was located at the side of the building where no one from outside could see the bathtub while the other... was located in full view of a block of HDB flats.
Oh dear.
She ordered the baked cod which turned out fantastic, with just a hint of sweetness, and I ordered their most highly recommended main course, the lamb shank, which was incredibly tender and just fell off the bone. The sauce was a little overwhelming after a while, but still, the lamb was well worth it.
But man, oh, man, nothing could beat the desserts. Much to my disappointment, the frozen banana was unavailable on account of the banana "not [being] frozen but mashed because something happened to the freezer" so we settled for tiramisu (with brandied cherries, my favourite), apple strudel and lavender honey (I love apple strudel/pie/tart/anything), banana tart (made up for the lack of the frozen banana) and the wonderfully rich Valrhona chocolate cake.
After savouring the spectacular desserts, my mentor convinced management to let us go up and see the rooms, which turned out to be nicely designed for a room that age (the building was built in 1929 after all) but incredibly small, much like the size of my London student hall room. The suites were cute, with outdoor bathtubs. One suite was located at the side of the building where no one from outside could see the bathtub while the other... was located in full view of a block of HDB flats.
Oh dear.
Monday, June 06, 2005
Hot Cha! You are:
69% Dateable!
That's higher than the Worldwide Dateability Average of 62%!
Attractive and confident, witty and charming, a healthy ambrosia-based diet... you're wanted in the 48 contiguous states, you slayer. Call me. Seduce me. Not only do you know how to turn the engines on, but you also know how to oil, lube and rotate them. You put the "elation" back into "relationship," and the "night" back into "one-night stand."
How dateable are you?
How dateable are you?
I took an Exotic Dance workshop over the weekend, and man, do I ache. The front of my thighs ache, my shoulder ache, and my abs burn. But it was good and now, I'm struggling to find time in my schedule to fit in a proper class. It wasn't as intimidating as I feared it would be, and the two instructors who came to my rescue after having learnt I hadn't been to a single Exotic class before were incredibly friendly.
Right after the workshop, I had to drag myself to Wala Wala to meet a friend. The opening conversation went something like this:
He: So what dance were you were learning?
Me: You really want to know?
He: Oh no, it's hip hop! (he's a big hip hop hater.)
Me: No. Exotic dance.
He: Oooh. Did you need a pole?
Me: Nope. You don't need anything. But... chair also can. Lap preferable.
He: Mmmmmm.
Right after the workshop, I had to drag myself to Wala Wala to meet a friend. The opening conversation went something like this:
He: So what dance were you were learning?
Me: You really want to know?
He: Oh no, it's hip hop! (he's a big hip hop hater.)
Me: No. Exotic dance.
He: Oooh. Did you need a pole?
Me: Nope. You don't need anything. But... chair also can. Lap preferable.
He: Mmmmmm.
Sunday, June 05, 2005
A sweet find from Old-Fashioned Love featured in the OC Metro:
Thanks, dear. That's all I needed to hear.
She's there, in the "Relationships" aisle. I catch a glimpse of the book she's looking at: "How to Date Like a Man." Ah, I think. Unlucky in love. The men who've made you think you need to change are cretins. Don't ever change.And on that note, I asked my close friend yesterday (male, very honest, and who also happens to think I'm hot and no, the last two qualities do not happen to be correlated) if I was doing anything wrong when it came to well, dating, or just how I come across. "No," he replied. "Not at all."
Thanks, dear. That's all I needed to hear.
In one of the Her World editions published this year, there's an article advocating that single gals should, instead of devoting time just going out with one guy at a time, juggle multiple partners... referring to dates lah, not sex. The rationale behind it is apparently, we tend to waste time on just one guy at a time, and when things don't work out, you have to start over, meaning you've just wasted six months or more of your time with just that one guy. So, the thing to do is to go out - for dinner, or just hang out - with different guys one-on-one simultaneously.
I somehow sense I didn't phrase that very well.
What I mean is that instead of going out with one guy a week, go out with a different guy every day of the week. And I have to admit that it does make sense. Men do that, so why don't women?
The thing with me is... I feel guilty going out with more than one guy at a time, even if it's not at the serious stage. I just feel bad, as if I'm manipulating the other guy who I'm not as serious about, because with me, there'll always be one guy who I prefer just that little bit more over the other(s). But, I'm looking to fix that guilt complex of mine and just try and enjoy life a bit more. And examining my going out habits more closely, I realise I have been dating multiple guys, just that my definition of date has been a lot narrower than that in the article, as I don't consider going out with guy friends mano a mano dating, but given that they're more than willing to hang out with me must surely mean something about my eligibility.
For instance, I went out to catch a movie on Friday night, hung out and caught up with a close friend on Saturday and today, while I was writing this post, another member of my 'harem' SMS'd me to see if I happened to be at km8.
So who knows? Maybe once I'm able to kick this guilt complex thing, I'll be able to date like a man.
I somehow sense I didn't phrase that very well.
What I mean is that instead of going out with one guy a week, go out with a different guy every day of the week. And I have to admit that it does make sense. Men do that, so why don't women?
The thing with me is... I feel guilty going out with more than one guy at a time, even if it's not at the serious stage. I just feel bad, as if I'm manipulating the other guy who I'm not as serious about, because with me, there'll always be one guy who I prefer just that little bit more over the other(s). But, I'm looking to fix that guilt complex of mine and just try and enjoy life a bit more. And examining my going out habits more closely, I realise I have been dating multiple guys, just that my definition of date has been a lot narrower than that in the article, as I don't consider going out with guy friends mano a mano dating, but given that they're more than willing to hang out with me must surely mean something about my eligibility.
For instance, I went out to catch a movie on Friday night, hung out and caught up with a close friend on Saturday and today, while I was writing this post, another member of my 'harem' SMS'd me to see if I happened to be at km8.
So who knows? Maybe once I'm able to kick this guilt complex thing, I'll be able to date like a man.
Saturday, June 04, 2005
"When I was in Hong Kong it was a real mixture of people from everywhere in the world and ecstasy wasn’t illegal until 1995. Plus, there were no licensing laws; you could get a drink 24 hours a day. Plus, people finished work anywhere between six at night and six in the morning so there was always a fresh crowd of people so it was very hedonistic there was always, like, a lot of energy going on in the club… and people were away from the watchful eyes of their parents or the police or their friends and they just went crazy in Hong Kong and really lived their life to the full. So much so that they spent time in our club six nights a week but still go to work at nine in the morning, straight from the club. It was a crazy, crazy time."
- Lee Burridge, Interview with DJVibe.com
No wonder my friend who works in Hong Kong says he doubts I'll be able to cope with working the same kind of job over there and continue clubbing the way I do.
Still, it's a challenge I'd love to undertake while I'm still able to.
- Lee Burridge, Interview with DJVibe.com
No wonder my friend who works in Hong Kong says he doubts I'll be able to cope with working the same kind of job over there and continue clubbing the way I do.
Still, it's a challenge I'd love to undertake while I'm still able to.
Mad Hot Ballroom:This looks like fun. I sure hope some kind cinema organisation brings it here.
On that note, if someone could bring It's All Gone Pete Tong here as well, I'll be very grateful.
On that note, if someone could bring It's All Gone Pete Tong here as well, I'll be very grateful.
Thursday, June 02, 2005
Yesterday, I caught The Busker's Opera directed by Robert Lepage and performed by Ex Machina. The Busker's Opera is an adaptation of John Gay's The Beggar's Opera which was also adapted by Bertolt Brecht and Kurt Weill as The Threepenny Opera.
While the previous operas largely revolved around characters from the criminal underworld, Lepage's adaptation is a satire aimed at the music industry and its cutthroats. The entire show is done in song, with each song would be sung in a different style, for instance, ska, reggae, blues, jazz, even disco. The main character is Macheath, the lead singer of the Highwaymen, a ska group making a comeback, and the show revolves around his weakness for women and all the trouble this gets him into especially as he's surrounded by avarious industry producers.
And as with the traditional opera style, the lyrics of each song were broadcast on a screen on stage, which also served as a video of other goings on as well as a camera displaying the close-ups of the characters on stage. The lyrics were deliberately trite, like a normal conversation, such as "Our Polly is a sad slut" (delivered beautifully in a melodramatic operatic fashion) while some were downright hilarious, with lyrics in Hebrew and Arabic displayed in speech balloons at one stage when two characters were slagging each other off.
The interesting thing about the cast is that they all have some sort of musical talent. Most of them can play at least one musical instrument, and all of them (obviously) have to sing. Some are real-life buskers, some are actors learning to sing and some are singers learning to act. At first I thought that surely they must be faking it as no one can play or DJ that well. Then I realised that they really did have talent, because no one can fake it that well.
The funniest parts of the show were:
While the previous operas largely revolved around characters from the criminal underworld, Lepage's adaptation is a satire aimed at the music industry and its cutthroats. The entire show is done in song, with each song would be sung in a different style, for instance, ska, reggae, blues, jazz, even disco. The main character is Macheath, the lead singer of the Highwaymen, a ska group making a comeback, and the show revolves around his weakness for women and all the trouble this gets him into especially as he's surrounded by avarious industry producers.
And as with the traditional opera style, the lyrics of each song were broadcast on a screen on stage, which also served as a video of other goings on as well as a camera displaying the close-ups of the characters on stage. The lyrics were deliberately trite, like a normal conversation, such as "Our Polly is a sad slut" (delivered beautifully in a melodramatic operatic fashion) while some were downright hilarious, with lyrics in Hebrew and Arabic displayed in speech balloons at one stage when two characters were slagging each other off.
The interesting thing about the cast is that they all have some sort of musical talent. Most of them can play at least one musical instrument, and all of them (obviously) have to sing. Some are real-life buskers, some are actors learning to sing and some are singers learning to act. At first I thought that surely they must be faking it as no one can play or DJ that well. Then I realised that they really did have talent, because no one can fake it that well.
The funniest parts of the show were:
- the New Orleans Republican Sheriff re-running for election, telling everyone to "Be afraid! Vote for me!" in an obvious parody of Bush
- the performance by Diana von Trappes, the cabaret singer. ("I will quote music up to the legal limit!"
- the scene in the Bayou Club by the swamp - whenever Lucy opened the door to the club, the musicians in the club would start playing lively music, whenever she exited, they'd stop abruptly. You had to see it. It was incredibly funny.
- And of course, the Killer Doowop Burger Crew who served up Macheath's last meal, performing an incredibly good musical number with unusual items.
- Not to forget the KDBC member wearing the Michael Jackson mask who, while pulling the meal cart out of the prison cell, moonwalked his way out of there.
"Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike."
- Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling
Just got put to work on something else after working like mad on an incredibly big project. I did tell my boss that I needed a break after my current project and he said, "I don't get a break. Why should you?"
There are far nicer, far better ways to respond to an obviously exhausted, discouraged, currently indispensable employee who is clearly thinking about leaving. Especially when the response is coming from someone who gets paid at least ten times the amount I do without putting in even 10% more than I do.
Would an "I appreciate your hard work, but I really need you to do this" have cost that much to say?
And yet, I find myself still trying to do the best job I can. Why is that? I blame my bloody work ethic.
- Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling
Just got put to work on something else after working like mad on an incredibly big project. I did tell my boss that I needed a break after my current project and he said, "I don't get a break. Why should you?"
There are far nicer, far better ways to respond to an obviously exhausted, discouraged, currently indispensable employee who is clearly thinking about leaving. Especially when the response is coming from someone who gets paid at least ten times the amount I do without putting in even 10% more than I do.
Would an "I appreciate your hard work, but I really need you to do this" have cost that much to say?
And yet, I find myself still trying to do the best job I can. Why is that? I blame my bloody work ethic.
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